


Without Duty

by Marvellous, SupernaturalGeekGirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bartender Castiel (Supernatural), Castiel and Jimmy Novak are Twins, Dead People, Destiel - Freeform, Firefighter Dean, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kindergarten, Kindness, Legal guardian Cas, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Nightmares, Siblings, Violent john Winchester, greif
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 02:26:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11796501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marvellous/pseuds/Marvellous, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SupernaturalGeekGirl/pseuds/SupernaturalGeekGirl
Summary: When duty calls dean is the first on the scene . But as a firefighter its his job to serve and protect  and for castiel Collins who lost everything in the fire including a brother , he goes far beyond  what he should have . Deans hope and companionship alone is enough to bring to his feet but with cas its never that easy.





	1. Chapter 1

Fire. 

Cas woke from his sleep and saw flames and the first thing he do was call 991. He asked desper-ately for help before dropping the phone and rushed to Anna's room. She was 6 and crying in the corner  
"Anna, hunny come on" he held his arms out for her to crawl into and once she did he rushed out and placed her on the grass.

Dean often worked the late shift at the station, and while most of the time there weren't any major incidents. Tonight there was a large fire though, which they had gotten to within minutes of having received the call. The flames cracked as they engulfed the building, the heat felt even from the distance they stood. His breath was heavy as his eyes observed the people who had made it out, listening to his chief if there was anybody still in the building.

Cas had got out all his sibling and he was about to collapse onto the grass when Anna started to cry  
"Goldie Goldie!" She cried to Cas , begging him to go and get the fish  
"This fish is going to be the death of me..." But all the same he turned around and ran back into the building.  
He got to Anna's room and had to stop. He couldn't see, breathe or move forward. He was sud-denly trapped in the burning building  
"C-crap" he coughed on the smoke that was filling his lungs

Dean had caught the site of a silhouette of a guy running back inside. He cursed to himself, just what they needed. "Guy just ran back in, I'm on it."  
Dean grabbed some stuff before pulling his mask on, following the path the other man had taken. He used his flashlight when he entered the smoke filled building, searching for the person he knew was in here.

Cas tried to shift the burning timber re blocked his path from getting out Anna's room but burnt his hands in the process. Groaning in pain he main the decision that he would have to go through the flames to get out. And he did. He jumped though the fire, the flames smoothing his skin, turning his once pale skin alarming red.  
That's when he heard cry’s coming from the hallway. Again without thinking he found the rope that was kept under the stairs and kicked a window in which wasn't hard because heat.  
It wasn't until the child was safely outside and in the arms of his mum that cas collapsed into a heap on the floor. He was burnt, battered and it felt like he was breathing in poison. He silently said a pray to his mum and closed his crystal blue eyes. The last thing he saw was something ex-tinguishing the flames which surrounded him

Dean had a hard time searching the rooms, the smoke getting thicker with every passing second, flames spreading and engulfing everything they could. He was about to radio back for help, when he heard noise. His steps were careful, cautious of hotspots, when he found him.  
"Winchester to engine 76, found the guy," he updated them so they didn't send any more people. He knelt down beside the young guy, whose eyes were closed. Dean panicked slightly. He did not want this to end badly.  
"Hey, wake up buddy," he said, putting an arm behind his shoulders, propping him up before hooking his other arm under his legs. He wasn't sure if he was conscious enough to hear him or not, but he kept talking anyways, "I'm going to get you out of here. Everything's going to be okay." He stood up then, having to find his way back through the changing path of the fire a new chal-lenge all in itself.

Cas bounced in and out of consciousness, his lungs trying to rid of the smoke which he had in-haled. He coughed and gripe tightly to the firemen who held him so carefully. He tried to say thank you but he slipped out of conciseness again

When Dean emerged from the building, he could hear parts of the structure caving in on itself, letting him know how lucky he was to have gotten out just in time. There were paramedics that rushed to him immediately, taking the guy from him. For the first time, Dean was able to get a good look at him, even though it was pretty dark out. The burns on him were clear, making Dean Frown. If he had been quicker maybe this would've had a better outcome. "You're in good hands now," he said, still unsure if he could hear him.

"D-don't leave me" the still wouldn't let go of deans uniform, his grip tight Despite his burnt hands  
"Don't leave me" he said again as the paramedics wheeled him away. The second oldest looking after the two youngest  
"Please"

Dean looked back to his crew who were still fighting the blaze and at the young man asking him to stay with him. One of the other firefighters jogged up to him.  
"Dean, come on, we need you, man," he said.  
"I can't. They need someone to go to the hospital with this guy," he said, even though that was a partial lie. He wasn't sure if they did need someone or not, but he didn't want to see him go on his own.  
"Chiefs not going to be happy."  
"I'll take the heat. Don't worry," Dean assured his colleague, then taking the young man's hand in his, only holding the top, to avoid the burns on his palm.

"Alright Winchester, on your head be it” his colleague rolled his eyes and ran to join fighting the fire.  
Cas groaned more as they wheeled him into the back of the ambulance, the sudden jolting mak-ing him more aware  
"M-my brothers and sister ..." He managed to say

"They can't all come in here," the paramedic said, already having eyed Dean in his firefighter gear distastefully for taking up as much room as he did. "Where are they?" he asked softly.

"I put them on the grass outside" Cas had taken off his mask too talk to the firefighter. He couldn't really see because ash clinged to his eyelashes blurring his vision  
"I'm C-Castiel Collins"

"I'll look after getting the kids, and I'll meet you at the hospital. Okay?" Dean checked with the guy whose name he now knew to be Castiel. He wasn't completely sure how he'd get however many kids to the hospital, but they probably needed to be checked out too, so someone needed to take them.

"C-call this number" he reached into his pocket and handed the other make a piece of white paper with a number on  
"Call him ...he will help them” he wasn’t able to hold onto the paper long and he dropped it as soon as dean grabbed it

Dean took the slip of paper, nodding. He didn't have a phone on him, but luckily the ambulance did. So he phoned the number, immediately explaining the situation and the location, holding Castiel's hand the whole time.

Cas tried to thank the firefighter who was still with him but he could feel himself passing out again due to the morphine which the paramedic had injected into his blood stream.  
The next thing Cas Knew, he was waking up in a hospital bed, a nurse wrapping dressing around the burns on his torso and chest

Dean had let them take Castiel in without following at first, taking a moment to strip off his jacket at least, because it was getting a little too hot for him. He also went to wash his face off in the bathroom before he went to the room he was told. The nurse was still dressing his burns, but Dean could tell he was awake. "How're you feeling, buddy?" Dean asked as he stood beside his bed.

At last cas could see, the ash had been washed from his eyes. He looked up to see a male walk-ing into his room. He assumed he was the one to pull him from his burning building  
"You...you saved me...” he still couldn't see perfectly because he didn't have his glasses.

Dean could see the other's bright blue eyes now. "Just doing my job," he assured him, managing a small smile, "The kids are being taken care of, by the way. They got here not long after you, but besides some smoke inhalation they're going to be fine." Dean bit his lip as he thought about how painful Castiel's injuries must be. "My name's Dean," he introduced himself.

"Well...thanks for saving me" his voice was gruff, clearly strained from everything that had hap-pened  
"Your that Winchester dude aren’t you ...been in the paper a few times “the only reason cas re-member this was deans eyes. His eyes were green but now he was standing in front of cas he was saw they were emerald

Dean smiled, a small laugh leaving his lips, "Yah, a couple times." He hadn't meant for that to happen, it just sort of did. "How're you feeling? Gonna pull through?" Dean asked.

"I have to pull though. I have 3 other siblings to look after ..." he moved his neck with difficulty so that the nurse could then bandage the burns there  
"I can't afford to be here...”

Dean frowned at his answer. Things sure didn't sound easy for the guy. "Do you have anyone to help you with the kids?" he asked, hoping Castiel had someone in his life who cared so much as to help him at a time like this.

"That number I gave you, he will have the kids for a couple of days ...but then I'll have to go to the council maybe they will house us temporarily " Cas groaned once the nurse had finished and leant back into the bed  
"I can't afford to be here ...literally” Cas looked back at dean who still was dirty with ash.

Dean rubbed a hand over his face. Life was cruel sometimes, to people who really did-n't deserve it. "Can I do anything for you?" he asked genuinely. Normally he wouldn't, but for some reason he wouldn't feel right leaving without offering something to Castiel. 

"Unless you have a spare flat or a few million dollars then no ...wait ...coffee would be good” cas smiled, his pearly white teeth showing, clearly not effected by the fire

Dean's heart jumped for some unexplainable reason when he saw the other smile. "Coffee. I can do that," he said with a smile, "How do you take it?" 

"Black please." He managed to sit up in the bed  
"I'm sweet enough thanks” he raised his left hand slowly, brushing his hair from his eyes

"A man after my own heart," Dean chuckled. His eyes were stuck on Castiel's move-ment for a while, before starting to walk backwards, "I'll be right back." 

"Thank you Dean" as cas spoke the words, he enjoyed how they just rolled off his tongue, how the name dean sounded like angels singing to him.  
He had to admit his attraction to the firefighter, he was a sucker for a man in uniform and dean was the definition of heaven.

Dean was fairly quick, locating the cafeteria and waiting in the small line for the coffee. When he got back he set the coffee on the small table, in reach of Castiel. "There you are," he said, smiling at the other.

"Thank you...I appreciate it...the coffee and you know the whole saving my life...and do you know anything about that little boy I found? " he asked curiously , it had been on his mind ever since

"I haven't heard anything," he said with a shake of his head, "I haven't even been back to the station yet. If I do find anything out I'll get a hold of you, though, okay?" 

"Y-you Came straight here with me?" He asked surprised. He didn’t really remember the journey to the hospital and for this worker to come to this place on his own? It made CAS a little emotional  
"Why? Aren't you going to get in trouble with this?”

The question was something that Dean had asked himself briefly too. "I...I don't know. It seemed like you needed someone," he said truthfully, "I might get a little heat, but trust me, I've done worse than this."

"You really should go...thank you for everything dean ...it really does mean something " cas smiled again

Dean bit his lip, not really wanting to leave, but knowing he should get back. "You sure you're going to be okay?" he said softly, taking a step closer to the bed.

"I will be okay, thank you for your concern but I will be okay...life goes on ..." he shrugged and forced a smile again

"You...you look me up if you need anything, okay?" Dean said, meeting Castiel's eyes seriously, "I mean it."

"I will” he nodded but he was lying, he wasn't going to pull dean into his messed up life. That wasn't fair

Dean nodded, throwing one last smile towards the younger man. "Okay," he said, be-lieving that might actually be the case and he'd be hearing from him, "Bye, Castiel."


	2. Chapter 2

It had been at least two months since the fire broke out at Castiles home. It had been a month and a half since he was discharged from hospital and it had been three weeks since he enrolled Anna in the closet nursery to the one bed flat that the government supplied for him and his 3 siblings.   
And for cas? There was only one person on his mind. Dean Winchester. The firefighter that has been the local hero multiple times. The man who had been his hero.   
Cas was thinking about him down as he used his crutches to pick Anna up since his burns still hadn't healed. He was so into his own little world that he didn't realize there was a curb and started to tumble

Dean had just picked up his younger brother Sam from his daycare. His parents had him when they were just out of high school, so twenty some years later they miracu-lously ended up having little Sam as well. The age difference wasn't exactly normal, but dean wouldn't change it for anything. He was listening to the kid tell him about some-thing he drew that day when he suddenly caught sight of someone a few feet away about to fall. He stepped the few steps and caught him in his arms just in time before he hit the ground. Dean blinked a few times as he looked at the dark haired blue eyed guy in his arms. "Castiel?" he breathed in surprise.

Cas was suddenly looking into the eyes of dean. The dean.   
"Dean? W-what are you doing here?" CAS managed to steady himself on his crutches and was able to look at dean properly. This also meant that dean was able to see him. His legs were still bandaged, but he had stop wrapping his neck because he was being stared at which was something he couldn't bear. But not it meant that the burns creep-ing up his neck were clearly seen.

Dean still held Cas in his arms, smiling as he met his eyes, "Picking up my little broth-er." He realized he should probably help him stand up, so he did, making sure he was steady before taking a step out of his space. "How're you doing?" he asked, taking in the state of the other male.

"I'm ...doing alright I suppose ...as well as I can be " This was a lie but instead he smiled as Anna ran towards him the saw her drift towards Sam   
"Apparently your brother knows my sister..." he smiled adjusting himself on the crutch-es.

Dean ran his fingers through his hair, following Castiel's eyes back to where the two kids were. "Looks like it," he said with a small smile before turning back to Castiel, not fully believing what he was told, "You sure you're okay?" 

Cas was about to reply when Anna came running over and started to tug at his sleeve. He winced in pain but didn't tell her to stop   
"Cas cas! Can Sam stay for dinner? Please cas please!"   
Cas looked at his sister and sighed. He wasn't sure if he had enough food to feed them 4 let alone another 2 

"Anna, princess I can't afford to feed Sam and his brother as well..."

Dean watched the little girl, smiling softly, when he felt a hand on his. Looking down at his brother he raised an eyebrow, "What is it Sammy?"   
"You should take them for dinner like you did with Lisa," he said, hand holding onto Dean's tightly now.  
Dean winced at the unexpected mention of his ex, but he saw the sense behind that suggestion.  
"There's some places around here. Let me buy you dinner, yah?" Dean offered.

"Buy me dinner? No no I can't possibly accept...if I eat out what are the other 3 going to eat? They need dinner..." cas put his body weight all in one crutch so he could run his hand though his hair

"Well, let’s go get the others, too. All on me," he said, picking up Sam who was reach-ing for him. He adjusted the kid on his hip before smiling at Castiel, "Really, I'd like to do this for you." Dean wasn't exactly loaded with money, but he could afford one dinner for four kids and two adults.

Cas couldn't believe what dean was saying. To dean, the offer didn't seem that major but to cas? This was the first act of kindness since, well since forever   
"Dean you don't have to ...it’s going to be expensive” Anna tugged at cas to be picked up but cas wasn't able   
"Anna, I can't I'm sorry, you have to walk" Anna didn't like this and started to cry

Dean set Sam back on the ground, because he knew he'd be okay with walking. He then knelt down beside Anna, "Hey, sweetheart, you want me to hold ya?" he then looked to Cas, "I know I don't have to, but I want to. Okay?"

 

Cas smiled and sighed. He knew that he wasn't going to win in this argument and Anna seemed pretty content to be carried by dean   
"Okay... where was you thinking?”

Dean lifted Anna, settling her on his hip. Sam held onto his free hand, staying some-what quiet, which wasn't abnormal for him. "You choose. Anywhere your heart desires," he said with a wink.

Immediately blush flooded to his cheeks and cas has to look away as they walked.   
"I...fish and chips? There's a place near mine and then Sam and Anna can place when we get to mine? “When Cas felt like his cheeks had cleared he looked back up   
"Maybe a coffee would do us both some good"

Dean nodded happily, "Sure, let's do that." It was his day off and like always he never had plans, so he was more than willing to have something to do. Spending the after-noon with Castiel didn't exactly seem hard.

"Great” Cas slowly walked towards the chip shop down his road. He was slow at walking and was really self-conscious that dean was getting annoyed at this   
"S-sorry I can't go very fast...” he turned the corner and pointed to the shop   
"There's the great chippy..."   
Anna giggled and agreed with Cas as she snuggled into deans chest, making her self quite at home

Dean instantly slowed, afraid he was walking too fast for the other. "Don't worry, take your time," Dean assured him, then looking at the smiling girl in his arms, "We're not in a rush are we?"

Anna shook her head "no, luci and Mikey always take ages to get home from school, Cas doesn't like it when they are late”   
Cas looked at his younger sister and rolled his eyes 

"Shhhh Anna, dean doesn't need to know about the boys"

Dean chuckled softly, "I don't mind." Sam started to speak up, asking Anna about something in school. While they were busy with their chatting, Dean looked at Cas as they walked. "How're they all holding up?" he asked.

"Anna...she hasn't really processed what happened but the boys ..." Cas stopped briefly to catch his breath   
"They are playing up in school, they won't listen to me and ...they blame me” Cas was-n't sure dean had seen the news about his brother

Dean listened, the whole time a frown present on his lips. He had heard what hap-pened, and there was a part of him that felt partially responsible. He should've gone back in, looked for more people, but he hadn't known. "It wasn't your fault, you know that, right?"

"But I should have known that he was in there. I should have known...Anna just thinks he's on a camping trip and not coming back even though I’ve tried to explain to her… “Cas stopped again but this time they was at the doors of the shop "here we are!"

Dean put a hand on Castiel's shoulder, squeezing lightly. "It wasn't your fault," he re-peated before adding, "You're doing amazing, Cas." Because Dean knew for a fact he wouldn't be able to deal with the circumstances that Cas had endured.

Cas jumped a little when dean patted his shoulder then he eased   
"Let's not talking about this here." Cas looked at dean as he stepped into the shop, Sam just ahead of him but Cas kept a very close eye on him mostly out of habit

Dean dropped the subject, as well as his hand on Cas' shoulder. "Sam, stay with me, buddy," he said, knowing the kid would definitely get into trouble if he went too far.

"Chips for the lot of us will be fine ..." he said to Sean just as they got to the counter , not really wanted to take too much however Anna had other ideas   
"But Cas! I want the savory!"

"Hey, you order whatever you want, got it?" he said to Cas before smiling at Anna in his arms, "Tell him what you'd like, sweetheart." Sam was busy doing that as well. One thing about Sam, he was definitely not shy.

Cas nodded and turned to the cashier   
“Hey can I get 2 savloys, one stake and kidney pie as well as ..." he thought for a sec-ond, his stomach rumbling loudly. He hasn't really eaten in the last week because eve-rything he had goes to his siblings   
"Cod please"

Dean listened to Castiel order, an impressed look on his face. The guy behind the coun-ter looked at Dean expectantly. Dean shook his head and ruffled Sam's hair, "I'll just share with this little guy. Thanks." He then pulled out his card, gladly paying for every-thing. 

"I really do appreciate this dean, you don't have to do this” he smiled great fully at dean and sank into a chair as they waited for his cod to be cooked as that normally took the longest. He kept a close eye on Anna as dean put her down

Dean sat the girl down beside her brother, then sitting himself beside Sam across from them. "Really, it's no trouble," he assured again, smiling brightly at Castiel.

It wasn't long till his cod was done and the cashier was handing him the bag when dean took it from him. He wouldn't have been able to carry it anyway   
"Thanks my place is a few doors down"

Dean nodded, standing up again, first making sure that Cas was good to go before checking on both the kids. "You kiddos ready?"   
Sam nodded enthusiastically.

Anna nodded, grabbing Sams hand and pulling him forward. From here she knew how to get to the flat and she was eager to get home   
Cas smiled and rolled his eyes fondly

Dean looked at the pair with an amused smile, watching them carefully, but his eyes drifted back to Cas part of the time they were walking as well. Dean couldn't help the protective feeling he felt, even if he couldn't explain exactly why.

Anna suddenly turned into a bungalow and started to hit the door. A few seconds later a 16 year old boy answered and picked her up   
"Luci we have guests!" She giggled then jumped down, both her and Sam disappearing into the small house 

"Hey I can take those" luci took the crutches from Cas and stepped aside so dean could follow Cas in

Dean let all the others go in before coming in himself. He said hello to whom he as-sumed was Cas' younger brother before his eyes took in the sight of the place. He bit his lip at first, before he looked to Castiel. "This is where you've been living since the fire?" he asked once the kids were out of earshot.

Cas waiting until he was in the small living room and sat down in one of the dining table chairs before answering   
“Yea, it was the only place I could afford. They won't re house us because apparently I made my self-homeless because I didn't attempt to put out the fire" Cas took a moment before pulling himself back to his feet and flicked on the kettle

Dean didn't sit down, frowning the whole time Castiel was speaking. "You can't keep liv-ing here," Dean stated, taking in the living conditions they were in. There had to be a way out of this for them. Perhaps Dean even had the solution. 

"Dean, I have no other choice but too, anyway someone I know is getting rid of their old sofa and said I can have it. This place would look better with a sofa “he pulled out two mugs from the cubored, putting a heap of coffee in each   
"So then the kids have something to sit on as well as guests” he didn't mention it also meant he wouldn't have to sleep on a roll Matt anymore

Dean bit his lip. This wasn't what he imagined for CAS. The poor guy had to go through so much, and he was stuck here in this place. "My place has a sofa," he interjected, looking into Castiel's bright blue eyes seriously.

"Dean I can't have your sofa, you need that" he poured in the water once it was boiled   
"Any way these chairs are alright I suppose” he shrugged and pulled out five plates. Looks like he's eating from the wrapping

"My place also has two extra rooms," Dean pressed, sort of trying to steer CAS back to his other hint. Dean was used to having roommates, but he hadn't had any for some time. He could certainly deal with having CAS there until he got back on his feet. How-ever long that took.

"Dean are ...are you offering me a place to live? A ..." CAS slowly turned around to face dean, his face clearly showing his surprise   
"How much a month?" Was his first question. Hopefully dean would ask a little less for the rooms then he was pay for the flat

Dean shook his head, a soft smile on his lips. "Don't worry about rent, okay?" he said, completely sure about that decision.

"What? Dean no ... I would have to contribute somehow ...but..." he turned back around, putting the food on the plates and calling the kids to dinner   
"I'm accepting the offer but it's also up to my siblings...would you mind asking them?" CAS couldn't help but smile widely while face inch away from dean. His whole posture lifting a little as if a weight had been lifted from them

"We can worry about that later," he said about CAS' concern of contributing something. Dean then looked at the smile on the others face and grinned as well, "Yah I can ask me." He turned to look at the kids who were now coming into the kitchen as well. "Now?" Dean asked CAS.

CAS nodded as he took his own plate and put dean’s coffee in front of him   
Normally he would wait for the kids to start eating but he knew they was all getting fed today so he started , his stomach rumbling loudly . The boys looked at CAS smiling at him eating. Glad that he was

Dean sat with Sam on his lap, looking to the three of CAS' siblings. "How would you guys feel about moving out of here?" He started, smiling at them at the same time.

"As in, move somewhere bigger?" Luci replied clearly the more vocal brother   
"But I already asked CAS, we can't afford it. That's why CAS sleeps on the roll mat." Luci looked at his older brother who winces at the mention of the roll mat.

Dean looked at CAS with a frown. That just furthered his insistence that they needed to move out of here. "Yah, my place has a couple extra rooms," he started, "And you guys wouldn't have to worry about affording it."

As soon as Anna heard that it would be with dean she jumped up. Mainly because he had practically become best friends with Sam over the last few weeks   
"Yes yes yes !"

Dean grinned at Anna before looking between the boys. "How about you two? You on board?" he asked. If they weren't, he wasn't sure he had a backup plan to get them out of this place.

They both nodded in unison, knowing that this was the best for the family and for CAS   
And at this moment CAS was able to relax as he finished the rest of his dinner   
"Thank you so much dean..."

"Really, it's my pleasure," Dean assured with a smile at CAS. "My place is kind of lone-ly, it'll be good to have company," he said about his small little house which wasn't all that far from here. 

CAS could feel himself getting emotional and he didn't want to cry in front of someone who was so strong and independent   
“this really does mean something to me dean ..." he put his rubbish into the bin and then lent against the counter because all the seats were taken.  
"When ...when did you want me to move in?”

Dean's heart did a little jump in his chest. He knew this was right. He stood up quickly to allow CAS a seat before he answered. "Sooner the better. Don't want you to stay here longer than you need to," Dean said with a glance around the place, "Got any plans this evening?"

"Apart from having you two over no...Are you saying we can come tonight?" CAS looked at Anna who had already jumped off the chair and ran towards her room and starting to throw what little they had into a rucksack  
CAS laughed as he watched Anna run to her room and turned back to dean  
"Well I see Anna is happy with that"

"I'd be happy to have you over now. How about I go run Sam back to my parents and I'll bring my car over? We can make a couple trips if we need too," he suggested, trying to figure out a plan for what was going to happen.

CAS nodded and sent the twins to also go and pack   
"We don't really have that much stuff ...mostly clothes. We lost everything else”  
CAS started to clear up, struggling on his still burnt legs

 

Dean shook his head, taking the dishes and what not from CAS' hands. "Let me do that," he insisted, taking care of getting everything to the trash and what not. "Okay, I'll be back in like 45 minutes, and I'll help you pack up everything," he said, "Sound good?"

CAS let dean take all of the trash and stepped back, sinking into the hard seat   
"In might actually get some good sleep tonight... and 45 minutes? I'll have everything ready by then ...as I said, I don't have much”

"I only have one bed in each room, but we can get bunkbeds for one of the rooms or something one day soon, and the couch is a pullout, so we'll figure it out," he explained of the sleeping arrangements. They weren't perfect but they had to be better than this. Dean rounded up Sam before smiling at CAS, "See you in a bit."

CAS thought for a moment   
"I have a bunk bed here, I can see if my mate can come over with his van?" While he talked his texted benny to ask and of course he said he was happy to help  
"He said yes, if that's okay with you dean?”

"More help the better," Dean said, glad CAS had someone who was willing to help, "Do we need anymore? I can see if one of my friends could come help out."

"No it's fine, benny is a big guy. Not that he would accept any help. He's so stubborn sometimes “CAS actually smiled and it wasn't some fake smile. It was really and he felt at ease

"Okay, cool," Dean said with a smile. The name was familiar, but Dean reminded him-self more than one person in this world were named Benny, so he didn't bother asking. "So, you good for a bit until I get back?"

Sam nodded before joining Anna again, helping her out her clothes into the pink suit-case she had   
"I'll look after him don't worry " CAS said reassuringly   
"Benny said he will be here in five to help"

"I got to run him back to our parents, actually," Dean said, looking at Sam who was pouting. He almost managed to stay. Sam was his brother and he loved him, but at the end of the day he went back to their parents.

"Ash that's okay, we will be ready by the time you get back, won't we kids!"   
They all grumbles a yes and continued packing

"Okay, I'll be quick," Dean said with a last smile towards CAS, picking up Sam then looking at the kids, "See you guys in a bit!"

Anna hugged Sam quickly saying goodbye then went back to the suitcase while CAS showed them out   
"See you soon dean” Cas already loved the way dean smiled, how the white of his teeth seemed to enhance the green. He was loving how the black shirt he wore was just a little too small or how his jeans fitted so well that they might as well have been sculpted around dean’s lower half. And those thighs. CAS had to stop himself thinking anymore

Dean had dropped Sam off, spoken briefly with his parents, who thought he was nuts for letting CAS and his siblings move in. Dean couldn't be bothered to care what they thought though. He was dead set on this happening and no one’s opinion was going to change that. Now he was back at CAS' place, and he knocked at the door, not wanting to assume he could just walk in.

Benny looked at CAS who nodded then he walked to the door and opened it. His eyes widened when he saw who it was   
"Son of a bitch, cassis savior is dean Winchester! Thought I heard the sweet purr of your beauty"

The surprise was evident in Dean's eyes when he saw the man who opened the door. "Benny? It's good to see you, man," he said with a grin, stepping into the apartment, "How do you know Cas?"

"I employed him down at the pub well until ...he's taking some off but I'm still trying to help as much as I can"   
Benny led dean into the small children's room where the bunk bed had been dismantled and there was a few bags next to it.   
CAS who heard Benny and dean talk seemed extremely embarrassed at the mention of him being a barboy

Dean nodded in understanding, following Benny and taking a few of the bags in his hands. "Are you going to take the bed in your vehicle then?" he double checked.

"Yea, it's not going to fit in your car boy," Benny rolled his eyes, lifting the bed with ease  
"Oi, mike open the back doors for Uncle Benny will you!"

"Yah, I got that," Dean said with a laugh, stepping out of his way and out to where CAS was still sitting. He had the kid’s bags, but nothing of CAS' as far as he knew. "You got stuff you want me to take to the car?" he asked.

"Only this” he stood up, picking up the rucksack of clothes and a rugged old bear which looked like it been though wars but CAS held it close to his chest   
"The rest is the kids"  
He struggled to get the back on his back then grabbed his crutches

Dean held out a hand to help CAS steady, not wanting the other to fall over. "Is there anything else you need to get before you leave?" he then asked, looking for anything that might look important.  
CAS thought for a moment and then walked slowly to the corner where there was a pil-low and blanket. He lifted the pillow, taking out a few bits of old paper and he tucked them safely in his pocket   
"Okay that's it ...I'm ready"

Dean watched CAS and the things he retrieved, but he didn't ask what they were. "Al-right then, let's get you home," Dean said with a soft smile, holding the front door open, waiting for Cas to go first.

CAS blushed hard when dean said this but he tried to turn his head so that dean would see. He didn't want to embarrass himself   
CAS slowly went out the door and stopped then he saw dean’s car   
"Dude! Is that a 1967 Chevy impala?!"

"It sure is," Dean confirmed, "My dad's pride and joy until my mom convinced him they needed something new. She became mine after that." He chuckled, keeping his pace close to CAS' so he didn't feel like he had to rush.

"She's beautiful" CAS walked up to the car, running his hands along the metal   
"Dad almost brought one exactly like this but got out bided by a few hundred bucks ...it's a shame really"

Dean bit his lip. Surely they didn't share this car in common as well? It would be too much of a coincidence...even so, Dean kept quiet about how his dad came to own this car...for now. "Oh man, that sucks," he said sympathetically.

CAS shrugged in the end and sighed   
"It wouldn't have fit the whole family anyway so probably good that dad didn't get it” Cas lifted the boot putting his bag in it

Dean nodded, "Yah, probably, hey." He moved to open the passenger door for CAS af-ter he had his bag in the back. "The kids coming in here or going with Benny?"

"They all wanted to go with Benny, but I won’t fit in there with them” he sighed and slid into the passenger seat   
"Whoa, these seats are comfy” he laid his crutches across the back seat and slowly stretched out his leg, wincing a little

Dean smiled at CAS, "Good." He then shut the door for him and went around to the driver's side. He slipped in and reached to the backseat first for a box filled with tapes. He put it in between then on the front seat and looked at CAS, "Pick whatever you'd like." Dean then started the car up, loving the way she sounded.

"Anything?” he asked flicking though the box filled with Metallica, AC/DC and other bands. In the end he chose the only one he knew and soon the car filled with the sound of guns and roses. It was knocking on heaven’s door. Castile’s favorite.  
Dean nodded, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. "Not bad," he breathed, slightly impressed by what the other chose.

"What do you mean not bad? This is one of my favorites! “Cas laughed, loving how dean tapped the starring wheel with his fingers

Dean laughed. "It’s great," he assured him, looking over to Castiel for as long as he dared to keep his eyes off the road.

"Hey keep your eyes on the road, you've got precious cargo here” CAS laughed again, he felt so at ease in the car with dean. As if he had known him all his life

"Right, sorry," he smiled, turning his eyes back to the road ahead. He pulled a Bob Seeger tape from in between the seats without looking. It was the only one that always seemed to miss getting back in the box. He held it out to CAS, "The one you chose is good, but this one is the best." He winked, then actually turned his attention fully to the road.

CAS raised a brow then shrugged, inserting the tape into the play and waited for the music to fill the car

Dean stole occasional glances at the other, turning up the volume as the tape started.

As CAS listened to the music he became more silent. He smiled gently but fiddled with his thumbs   
"This was my parents wedding song"

Dean's eyes grew softer, "They had good taste." He smiled softly at the other. He won-dered what happened to CAS' parents, but he didn't really want to ask.

"Yes they did.” he turned the music down just a little so that he could hear dean better   
"They say I was conceived to night moves"

"Well, I'll never listen to that song the same way again," he said with a laugh, "Guess it makes for good kids though."

"You will never listen to it the same way? What about me!" CAS grinned, brushing his messy hair out of his eyes "I’m scarred man. For life

Seeing this side of Castiel was different, almost like for these few moments the younger man didn't have such great worries that he carried around with him. "You've got a good smile, Cas," he said, glancing at him quickly.

This took CAS off guard and blush flooded his cheeks.  
"Thanks” he managed to stutter before finding his feet again  
"I feel like I haven't smiled in a long while, you know?" CAS unwound the window and let the wind ruffle his hair.

Dean welcomed the evening breeze that blew through the window. "Well, we should change that," he said decidedly. Now that CAS we going to live with him, he could make that a goal; make sure CAS smiles as often as possible. 

"Is that challenge accepted Mr. Winchester?” CAS turned back towards dean a smirk forming   
"I'm a very hard man to please” Cas said this in quite a suggestive tone

Dean raised his eyebrow, laughing slightly, "Then I guess I'm going to have to try pretty hard." He still managed to keep his eyes on the road for the most part. Luckily.

"Yes you are, anyway where do you live. It seems we've been driving forever. “It really had only been a few minutes but to CAS it seemed at least 20

"Outskirts of town," he said, turning a corner as he did so, "It's further, but I've got more space out here, and it's quieter." It wasn't long before they pulled into the drive-way, Benny already there and waiting. "Welcome home," Dean said to CAS with a wink as he brought the car to a halt.

CAS could see that Benny had already started to unload the van because the bunk was gone and so were the kids   
"Looks like Benny has already let himself in which means he has a key...what's with the history between you and Benny?"

Dean sat back as he took the keys out, looking at CAS without worrying about the road. "He helped me out years ago. I was younger and didn't know what I wanted to do with my life, so he gave me a job for a couple years," he started to explain, "Then Benny was the one who suggested I become a firefighter and now it's four years later and I guess it was a pretty good decision." He smiled at the other then.

"It was a good idea because otherwise I would be dead and my siblings would be com-pletely alone and they've suffered enough ...anyway it seems that Benny was there for both of us when we needed him most" he chuckled watching dean lean back into the seat

Dean nodded, "Yup. Too bad we didn't meet under better circumstances, but we just got to make the best of what life's given' us, right?" He looked out the window at Benny who was watching them, "Should we go inside?"

 

CAS sat for a moment going over what dean had said in his head   
Make the best of what life has given. But for CAS it's not what life has given it what it has taken.   
His mum. His dad. His little brother. Hell it even took his home and everything that be-longed to his dad. The reality was that a bunk bed and four bin bags was what he had as proof of his existence   
"Yea ...let’s go inside” he forced a smile to his face

Dean bit his lip. He had never been good with words. The chance that he had offended Castiel was high...probably several times, too. He also tried to avoid conflict as much as possible, so instead of addressing it, he ignored it and nodded, getting out of the car. "I have a dog, by the way," he said suddenly before they reached the door, "Are you al-lergic? Cause my parents wouldn't mind having' her for a while."

"I am a little but not too bad. You don't need to send your dog anywhere. Anna would have a fit" he smiled and pulled himself from the car, picking up his crutch as he did

"She's great with kids too," he assured, "But if your allergies get too bad let me know, okay?" Benny had already went back inside, probably to set up the bed or something, so Dean held the door open for Cas before going inside himself.

As CAS walked in Anna ran up to him full of joy   
"Dean had a dog CAS dean had a dog!" She giggled running back towards the dog.  
CAS smiled and rolled his eyes   
"I can see that princess”

Nearly seven years ago Dean had gotten Harley when she was just a puppy. She was big, mostly black with a white chest and some brown patches, and big floppy ears. Re-ally she was just a big suck who loved attention, but she made his life a little less lonely. Her tongue hung out of her mouth as she looked at Dean, clearly loving the attention she was getting from the kids.  
"Looks like she likes you, too," he said to Anna with a fond smile. The dog then padded over to CAS and sat down in front of him expectantly, tilting her head and holding out a paw, one of her tricks. Dean chuckled softly, "Leave him alone, Harley. Go play with the kids." He turned to CAS then, "Want me to show you the rooms?"

"No no it's fine" he crouched shaking the dogs paw   
"Your beautiful Arnt you" he smiled and stood back up straight with a grunt   
"Yes please dean that would be great”

Dean watched the two and his heart beat a little faster. He motioned for CAS to follow him then, through the kitchen and living room area down the hall. The first room was where Benny was already nearly setting up the bunk bed, and there was a single bed that had already been there. "So this'll be the kid’s room," he said, letting CAS look in. Instead of staying with the kids, Harley was at the younger man's heels. Of course she'd latch onto the one with allergies.

"Wait I'll get my own room? I was going to suggest Anna gets her own room for a while ...they all need some time to them self’s. I don't mind sleeping on the sofa “without rel-ishing is CAS was fuzzing Harley

Dean raised an eyebrow at CAS, "Are you sure? The couch is a pullout, not a bad one either...or you could have my room for a while."

"I wouldn't dream of forcing you out of your own room dean. You have already done so much for us. “Cas smiled at the twins who was chatting with Benny and Anna who was already putting her teddy’s on the bed   
"They need time to settle in"

"Okay," he said, following CAS' gaze to the kids, "Want Anna to have the other room then?" He didn't feel right about CAS coming to live with him and being out on the couch...but it'd only be for a little while, he told himself. They'd figure it out.

"It's all about them right now dean, you’ll have to understand this. I need to make this as easy as I can for them ...yes Anna will have the other room"

"I get it, Cas. I know what you're doing for them. They couldn't ask for a better brother than you," Dean said. He really did admire Castiel for what he was doing for his siblings. "I'll go get you blankets and pillows from the closet for the couch if you want to help them get settled or anything," he offered.

"I probably should help Anna” Cas led Anna into the spare room and started to help her unpack without saying a word

Dean watched him walk down the hall with Anna, Harley trailing after both of them be-fore he went to get said blankets. He started to pull out the bed and make it so it was ready for CAS. It didn't take long and when he looked up he saw Benny who was fin-ished with the bunk beds. "You leaving'?" he asked, figuring he probably had to get back to the bar and what not.

"Yea I probably should. I know he's in good hands here but dean. He's been through a lot ....look after him okay?" Benny straightened his jacket, taking his keys out his pocket

"I will," he said, those two words said as if his life was dependent on it. He was going to make sure CAS and his siblings were safe here, and that they wouldn't have to go back to living the way they had been, "I'll see you around, Benny."

"And tell CAS that he doesn't need to rush back to work like he's thinking. I'm putting him on sick leave ...he'll still get pay" Benny smiled and walked out the door

"I'll let him know. Thanks, Benny," he watched as the man walked out the door. He could hear the kids in their rooms, so he figured CAS had it all handled. He sat down on one of the chairs in the living room and let it sink in. His life was going to change now with four other people in the house, but he had never been surer about something in his life.


	3. Chapter 3

——————

As soon as CAS had finished helping Anna he walked into the living room and collapsed onto the sofa. He didn't really notice that Harley had jumped up next to him because the next this he knew he woke and the sun shone though the curtains   
"Crap!"

Dean had gotten up early and the kids were ready when he noticed CAS was asleep. Since it was his day off, he didn't mind giving them a lift to school, the twins were pretty good at giving directions. When he got back CAS was still asleep, and when he woke up Dean was leaning against the counter in the kitchen. "Morning, sunshine," he said, put-ting a cup of coffee on the table by the couch, "Don't worry. The kids got to school fine."

"What about Anna, is she okay, did she take her toy. Its show and tell today" CAS got off the sofa clearly flustered

"Yup, she's got everything she needs. The boys helped me out, everyone got where they needed to be in time," he smiled softly at CAS.

"T-they did?” CAS slowly calmed down and sat back down into the sofa slowly   
"T--that's so out of character”

Dean sat across from CAS, "Yah, they were great. I told them I'd get my old video game system set up if they helped me out, too, so maybe that made a difference." He chuckled softly as he watched Harley hop back up on the couch beside CAS. She really was glued to him.

"Ash...bribery at its finest " Cas smiled , letting his hand rest on Harley's back once again without relishing it

"If she's bugging you just push her off," Dean said about the dog. He took a sip of the cup of coffee he held before smiling at CAS again, "Have anything you need to do to-day?"

"Honestly no...I ...well I need to call Benny but that's about it" he picked up his own cof-fee, sipping from it

"Benny said not to worry about rushing back to work," he told him, "He's got you on sick leave so you don't have to stress too much for a while."

"He did?" CAS didn't know how to handle all of this. It seemed like it was hand out after hand out

"Yah," he said with a nod. "You need time to heal too, Cas," he said carefully, "You're doing fucking amazing, but you're going to burn yourself out if you don't give yourself some time."

"I know... but since it happened everything was just about them. To keep them housed , fed even if it meant I missed quite a few meals myself ... I had to keep them distract-ed from gap." he couldn't even say his brother’s name

Dean frowned, able to see the other was struggling. He couldn't even imagine what he was going through, but maybe he could help him feel better. "How about we go do something this afternoon?" he offered, "Something to let you let loose for a few hours." 

"I don’t know but I need something to eat" as if on time his stomach rumbled loudly. Even though he ate yesterday his body still demanded food

"Got pancakes staying warm in the oven," Dean offered. He wasn't sure if CAS wanted that for breakfast, but he had extras anyways.

"Pancakes? Do you have Nutella as well? The best thing ever is Nutella pancakes “he smiled finishing the coffee dean made him loving how dean remember how he had it even from a few months ago

"I'd be crazy not to," he said with a grin before heading into the kitchen and getting the pancakes out of the oven and Nutella out of the cupboard. "Have at it." 

CAS didn't even wait as he jumped over the sofa and started to eat the pancakes, moaning at the taste   
"Oh god...mmmmm"

Dean smiled, glad to see some of the weight off CAS' shoulder at something seemingly simple. "They're alright then?" he asked with a laugh.

"They are delicious dean, thank you" he wiped the chocolate away from his mouth and took a breather   
"I feel a little better"

Dean poured himself another cup of coffee, smiling at CAS. "Good, I'm glad," he said as he sat down across from him again, "I was thinking about taking Harley to the park or on one of the trails near here. You just want to hang out at the house? I'll give you a key and what not if you want to leave and come back. Or I can take you anywhere you want." He thought giving CAS some options was a good idea. He deserved to decide what he wanted to after all.

"No it's okay, I'll come on the trail walk with you...again I will be slow but you already know this " he blushed slightly but tried to play it off

"We'll take it slow," Dean assured him with a wink, "It's a pretty short drive, and the walk won't take longer than an hour and a half, so we'll be home with lots of time to spare to pick up Anna and the boys."

"Are some I'll ...I'll just go and get changed...” CAS took some clothes out of his bag and went into the bathroom but soon came across a problem. Where he had slept in his jeans his leg burns had wept, sealing his jeans to his leg. He had been in there so long dean started to worry

Ten minutes passed and Dean was concerned. 15 and he decided to go check on CAS. He knocked on the bathroom door. "You alright, CAS?" he asked, the worry clear in his voice.

"M-my jeans, I can't get them off" he gave them a little tug then groaned in pain  
He decided at this point dean was the only one who could help and he unlocked the door

Dean heard the door unlock and he took that as his cue to go in. He closed it behind him to keep Harley out of the way, he frowned at CAS, and clearly the other was in pain, "What can I do to help you, CAS?"

"M-my burns...my jeans are stuck. I can't get them off ..." Castile’s hands were shak-ing. Normally at night be would have a routine and physio which included mortise to stop this happening

Dean bit his lip. "Fuck," he murmured softly, trying to thing of the least painful solution to this, "You got any ideas?" 

CAS shook his head   
"Your going to have to pull ...rip off the band aid dean ...god how could I be so stupid” Cas got a towel and wrapped it around his middle so if dean did accidentally pull off his underwear then dean wouldn't be scarred

"Hey, don't worry, okay," he said softly, putting a hand on CAS' shoulder before he knelt down so he could pull them down easier. All he could think about was how much this would hurt the other, making him hesitate. "Should I count to three or something?" 

"Just do it now" CAS took a deep breath and readied himself knowing he was going to be in a lot of pain

Dean knew he couldn't procrastinate any longer. Before he could give CAS a few mo-ments to get ready, he pulled his jeans down as fast as he could, past his thighs so they fell around his ankles.

 

CAS groaned in pain and gripped the edge of the bath. He could feel his legs throbbing but he tried to ignore it which was almost impossible

Dean winced at the sound Castiel made. "Hey, it’s over," he said quietly, putting a hand on Cas' thigh, "You're all good. Do you need something for those burns now?"

"M-my cream it’s in my rucksack...I'm meant to do it every night to prevent this" CAS tried to calm himself down, breathing in through the nose and out though the mouth to reduce pain

Dean saw the amount of pain he was in, and every bit of him wanted to give him a hug, but he didn't want to overstep boundaries. "I'll go get that. Do you need a pair of sweat-pants too or something?”

CAS managed to nod, lowering himself to the bathroom floor as dean fetched what he needed   
He was kicking himself mentally for being so stupid. Now it was going to be even longer before he healed

Dean came back a few minutes later and held up the bottle of cream and set the pair of pants on the counter. "Do you need help putting it on?"

CAS knew that he needed help but didn't want to make dean feel uncomfortable in his own home and shook his head   
"I will manage on my own dean..."

"Don't say you don't need help if you do," Dean said, sensing the hesitation  
As he knelt down beside CAS again, "I'm here to help you if you need me, got it?"

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable in your own home" Castile’s voice was a bit shaky from the pain   
"It's not just my legs that need to be covered” it was true   
It was a nightly routine which Luci normally helped with. His back was the parts he couldn't reach

"Wouldn't offer if I felt uncomfortable," Dean promised as he met CAS' eyes. He took one of his hands gently. "Let me help you, CAS," his voice was soft.

This made the butterflies in his stomach flutter and for a moment he forgot the pain in his legs. He forgot the emotional pain of the last few months because nothing else mat-tered expected the man that knelt in front of him.  
Somehow CAS managed to divert his gaze   
"It's my back..."

 

Dean nodded slowly, "That's okay. Wherever you need it." He offered a small smile to CAS when he managed to meet his eyes. 

"O...okay but prepare yourself, it's not a pretty sight" CAS sighed and gripped the bot-tom of his shirt and pulled it over his head. Burns covered most of his torso and back and the skin that was unharmed were clearly riddled with self-harm scars. They were old but still extremely visible

Dean inhaled sharply as he laid eyes on the other's skin. The burns were still clearly vis-ible, but it was the old scars that had Dean doing a double take. He didn't want to men-tion them, in case of offending CAS like he was sure he had so many times already. He just smiled sympathetically at the other male before putting some of the cream into his palm. "I'll be as gentle as I can," he promised.

"Please, my back is really sensitive, so try and avoid putting too much pressure” Cas knew that he shouldn't be this comfortable with dean after knowing him for a day but somehow he did. He trusted dean completely

Dean nodded, moving so he could sit behind CAS. He was true to his word and his touch was light as he rubbed it on the injuries that the other had there. "Is that okay? Do you need me to stop?" Dean asked, concerned he might be doing it too hard for CAS.

"No keep going" his grip tightened on the bath. CAS had refused Painkillers knowing they had side effects which would have prevented him looking after his family

Dean didn't know if there was anything he could do to distract CAS from the pain he was feeling, but acting upon instinct he started to sing. Softly, and maybe not very well, but at least it was probably distracting. He hoped.

CAS was starting to shake from the pain when he heard dean, slowly starting to sing. It was like an angel had started to sing. He sounded amazing   
CAS slowly turned towards dean, looking at him. 

He didn't know what was happening to him. In one day this man had not only changed his life for him and his family but also made him fall completely in love with him and he knew it sounded stupid but that is how he felt.   
Before CAS even realized it himself he was kissing dean, his own dry lips pushed against the cherry tasting flavor of deans. He felt dean tense and CAS regained control   
He stood up very quickly pulling the trackies on and headed towards the front door quickly. It hurt to move like that but he couldn't see dean’s reaction right now 

"I need to pick up some pain killers" he said as he half ran out the house, tugging on a shirt as he went

Dean was taken off guard to say the least. At first he didn't resist, sinking into the feel-ing of Castiel's lips on his. Then his brain caught up with him. Dean wasn't good at this sort of thing. If they went down this road, he would surely end up causing CAS more trouble. He didn't want that for him. Dean's muscles tensed but Castiel was already pull-ing away.   
"Cas," he murmured, still sitting on the floor as the other got up.   
Dean got to his feet once he was out the bathroom door and followed him. "CAS, wait!" he pleaded. The other couldn't go far, but Dean still worried as the front door shut. He went onto the front step, Harley pushing her way past him and following CAS. He wasn't worried about her, she never had a leash anyways, so at least he knew he'd be safe. Dean sighed and sat down on the step, putting his face in his hands. This was some-thing he hadn't accounted for happening.

It wasn't until CAS was half way down the road that he staggered to a stop and lent heavily on a lap post. At first his adrenaline had helped him push past the pain as he ran but now he was in agony. He wasn't lying he did need painkillers but not wasn't the time to be wondering the streets alone.   
He slowly slid down the lamppost still be was sitting against it, Harley already kicking his cheek. Harley took a step back, and started to bark and she never barked   
"It's okay Harley. I'm okay...just stupid" he whispered

Dean sat there for a while, well it felt like awhile anyways, before he decided he needed to go find CAS. Whatever just happened, they'd need to discuss it eventually. Better now than pushing it off until later. He heard the sound of a familiar bark and soon found CAS. He approached slowly and sat down beside him, "Cas...you okay?" 

CAS couldn't look at dean. He had  
Gotten himself into a state and now he was crying into his hands as he shook. He man-aged to take a breath before speaking   
"I'm sorry dean, I shouldn't have done that..."

Dean gently took CAS in his arms, hating having to watch him cry. "Ahh, hey, it's okay, CAS," he said softly, careful not to hold too tight. "Really, it’s fine," he assured, hoping the other might calm down a bit.

CAS could feel dean gently pull him onto his arms and he melted into him. He could feel himself calming down which meant the pain roared back into life   
"D-dean...take me to the hospital” he strutted   
He needed pain relief and going through the GP would take at least a week   
CAS suddenly tightened on dean’s jacket   
"Dean take me to the hospital now!”

The change of tone in Castiel had Dean getting to his feet, helping CAS up as well. "Come on, let’s go," he said, making sure one of CAS' arms was around his shoulders as they walked back to the house. Luckily he had the keys in his jacket, and he helped CAS in. Harley jumped in the backseat of the car, since he didn't really have time to go put her inside.

CAS couldn't stand the pain. It hasn't been this bad for a while but maybe it did have to do with the events of the day. He hated himself for making a scene because now he was in agony and all he could do was wither in the passenger seat as dean drove to the hospital. Even Harley who was in the back seat could since Castile’s extreme distress and was whining loudly

"It's okay CAS, we'll be there before you know it," Dean said softly, trying to say any-thing that might help. He was pretty sure it wouldn't though. Luckily the hospital wasn't far, but for CAS it wasn't fast enough.

The drive seemed like hours. CAS was struggling to breathe to he reached over turning on the music which happened to be night moves   
He couldn't help but chuckle

As soon as the music found Dean's ears, he couldn't find it in himself not to smile at the slightly chuckle it was able to get out of CAS. Soon after he pulled into the parking lot of the hospital.

"Dean ...you have to help me out...I ...can't walk well" CAS was starting to feel really drowsy and heavy. He tried to support himself as best as he could

Dean went around to the passenger’s side and helped CAS out before realizing he wasn't in good shape to walk inside. "Its okay, you're going to be okay," he breathed, "You okay if I carry you in?""

CAS nodded, knowing that it is probably the only way. But to be honest he wouldn't mind because he was still falling for this knight in shining fire gear

Dean picked him up, one arm under his legs, the other supporting his back. It was all very reminiscent of the night of the fire. "You're going to be okay," he repeated as he shut the door to the car, Harley barking from inside while he made a beeline for the emergency room doors. 

As soon as they entered the ER a nurse saw them and was immediately by their side. At this point CAS was drifting in and out of consciousness

"Mr. Novak?! What happened?" The nurse led them into ressus, shouting to get Dr.Drake. Castile’s doctor

Dean was trying to keep it together, but he was starting to panic. His heart rate elevat-ed as he put CAS on the stretcher, losing the contact with the other. He held his hand tightly, "We're here now, and you’re going to be okay." He figured if he kept repeating it then surely it'd be true.

CAS didn't hear was dean said but he rolled his head to look at dean, his eyes bright. He's hand reached out and took hold of the other males. Then he lost consciousness again, looking helpless as tubes and a mask was placed on him

"Cas," he said weakly as he was pushed out of the way by the nurses and doctor, let-ting go of his hand. He wasn't sure he knew what was happening, but his world was spinning. "He's going to be okay, right?" 

"We don't know what's wrong with him at this moment. If you could tell me what he's been doing these last couple of days that would be great"

Dean shook his head trying to think. "CAS and his siblings just moved into my place yesterday, but he never did any heavy lifting and I don't think it was stressful...past yes-terday I'm not sure, but I thought he was takin it easy." 

"Well, from his condition it's clear that he hasn't been.” the nurse had just been examin-ing Cas  
"He's extremely underweight and by the look of it he's been doing labor work. But we won't know until he wakes ..."

Dean ran a hand over his face before looking to CAS, sighing softly. He was going to have to keep a close eye on the other. "He's going to be okay?" he pressed again, hop-ing the nurse would be able to tell him something. 

"We are unsure, where CAS has been putting strain on his body most of his muscles are exhausted. Which caused what ever happened today. Mr. Novak spent a lot of time with us after being brought in by a firefighter. We told him to find help ..."

Dean bit his lip, wondering if this was all his fault. He should have been there for him more. "How can you not tell if he's going to be okay though? He's breathing, right? He's got to be okay," he went on, her words only partially registering with him. 

 

"He's struggling right now, were not sure what's wrong but we're about to incubate" just as she said this alarms started to go off and she rushed to Castiles side   
"He's going into VF, keep his heart going. He signed a DNR!"

Dean's breaths quickened. This wasn't happening. He heard what she was saying and the panic grew. Why would Castiel do that? There was no way Dean was going to let him go that easy. "No. You listen to me, you keep him alive. He can't...please," he pleaded as he met the nurse’s eyes.

More alarms sounded, indicating that the male didn't have a pulse   
"I'm sorry, a DNR is a legal document. If I break it he could sue ...he...” the nurse knew that she should. Over the last few months she and CAS had become friends

Dean felt his eyes sting. He hadn't even known CAS long...but he knew he couldn't lose him. Not like this. "He'll have to sue me then," he said desperately, "Please. I can't lose him." 

The nurse was debating what to do and in the end she decided to bring him back   
"Fine okay, okay I need 10 mg of adrenaline” she stepped forward and started chest compressions

Dean kept his eyes on Castiel's lifeless face. His siblings needed him so badly. And Dean needed to see those blue eyes again, see that smile. "You're not getting out that easy," he murmured softly, not realizing he had his fingers crossed. CAS was going to be okay.

"Okay pulse check!"   
The nurse checked his pulse   
"Okay we are going to have to shock him. Start at 150" the room started to fill with the sound of the defib charging   
"Clear!" She then shocked CAS, his body shook as she did

Dean's eyes were glued to CAS, silently willing him to come back. "Come on, sweet-heart," he said, even though he knew Castiel could hear him.

"Again!" The nurse repeated the process two more times and still no pulse.   
She looked at dean and shook her head   
"Say your goodbyes and will call it..." she looked devastated

A flash of anger passed through Dean's eyes, stepping closer to the bed and taking CAS' hands. "No. No, no, no," he repeated, "Dammit Cas, please." He looked at the nurse, "You have to keep trying."

"He's gone sir...say goodbye before we announce the time...I'm sorry" the nurse was clearly upset but they tried

 

This wasn't the way it was supposed to go. "Cas," he murmured, feeling every emotion drain out of him. What was he going to tell his siblings? The lump in his throat prevent-ed him from saying anything, so instead he leaned forward and rested his forehead on Castiel's still warm shoulder, his body shaking with the reality of the situation hitting him.

 

CAS could hear dean but he couldn't pull himself out of the darkness. Just after they turned off the heart monitor his heart started to pump weakly. His breathing shallow so he appeared dead. He tried to move but he couldn’t. He just wanted to reassure dean

"Cas," he said again, still the only word he was able to make come out of his mouth. "I was supposed to help you," he sniffed. He failed CAS that much was obvious. 

Again CAS tried to reply but he couldn’t. He couldn't talk. He focused on all his strength to talk

The warmth was fading fast from Castiel's body and Dean moved to press his lips to the others forehead. He didn't want this to be goodbye, so he couldn't make himself say it, "I'll be seeing you, my friend." 

Finally CAS managed to break from the black cloud that was pressing down on him.  
"You’re not getting rid of me that easily” Cas slowly opened his eyes, his gaze finding dean in a heartbeat

Dean's heart nearly stopped at the sudden voice. "Thank god," he breathed, smiling as soon as he saw those blue eyes. He put his hand on the side of Castiel's face and he felt his eyes burning again, this time from happiness, "Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?"

"I'm...I'm sorry I will try not to ..." CAS looked at dean, he could see that the man’s eyes were red raw clearly from crying   
"Did...did you call me sweetheart?" He asked, smirking slightly

After this they were going home and he was going to make sure CAS did not leave the house until he was 110% better. "You know it," he said, a soft laugh on his breath. 

"Okay but don't expect me to make breakfast in bed...” CAS joke to distract himself from the doctors and nurses poking and prodding  
"You know I could sue ..." he said. He wasn't going to but he didn't understand why they would risk it just for him

"I don't expect you to do anything," Dean said somewhat seriously, letting his hand fall from CAS' face. He listened to what Castiel said before he bit his lip, "I told them to, so you'd have to sue me." 

"Fine I'll sue you ...for a banana and a packet of peanuts” luckily all the pain he was in had gone. He could hear the doctor talking and apparently his heart have out before the strain from the pain and how underweight he was  
"I'll be okay...I...” CAS was able to move now but he didn’t. He didn't want dean to move either.

Dean's hand moved on top of Castiel's and nodded, "Yah, you are going to be okay. I'll make sure of that. I have some vacation days I still have to use, so I'll take some time off, get you back up to speed." His eyes didn't leave Castiel's. 

"D-don't do it because you feel you have to..." CAS was worried for dean. He didn't want dean doing anything because he felt responsible for what happened. This was all Castiles fault

"I don't feel like I have to do anything," Dean assured him, "I want to, Cas. Trust me."

"I trust you dean...with my life" CAS had never trusted anyone like he did dean and deep down he knew dean was aware of this

That meant a lot to Dean. He was aware that CAS didn't have many people he could trust, but he was glad he could be one of them. He smiled softly and squeezed CAS' hand lightly in response before turning to one of the nurses. "How soon can he come home?" Dean asked. 

"I've been looking at his vitals and it's like that didn't even happen ...I'm not even reli-gious but I would say this is a miracle...two, three hours tops?"   
Cas sighed in relief just in time for the school run"

Dean nodded in understanding before looking at CAS. "You're going to rest, and I'm go-ing to go pick up the kids," he told him, not leaving room for debate. 

"Oh please, I'll just sit in the car...we'll go there straight from the hospital " CAS tried to give him puppy eyes when suddenly there was a bark. He looked at the door to see Harley running in   
"Harley?"

"Fine," he said. Surely it would be that stressful. His eyebrows creased when he heard CAS say his dog’s name. He turned around and sure enough saw her padding over, "Fuck, I must have left the window open." The dog reached them and put her paws on the side of the bed CAS was on, tongue hanging out her mouth as she barked happily. Dean looked at the nurse, "Can she be in here?" 

The nurse walked towards the dog who growled. She sighed   
"Seems like she's not leaving. Keep her quiet and we'll prescribe CAS some anti-allergy tablets. The best you can get" 

CAS simply laughed and massaged the dogs ear   
"I think we have a problem with this one

Dean had to chuckle as well, his free hand petting Harley's back. She nosed CAS' hand and let her head rest on his thigh. "She's really latched onto you," he said with a smile. 

"Yea...I know the feeling...” his eyes flickered between the dog and dean. He knew he needed to address what happened in the bathroom so he despised to talk about it now  
"Dean...about what happened in the bathroom..."

In the whole whirlwind of events, what happened in the bathroom had disappeared from Dean's mind until this moment. He sighed and nodded, "Don't worry about it, CAS. It's fine."

"Okay...me..." CAS stopped talking and looked at the ceiling. Hopefully from here eve-rything will be better. He had someone to look after him and he was able to heal faster since he wasn't working his labor job down at the farm.

Dean smiled at the other. He'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy that kiss...but he was afraid of anything messing up what they had going already. "Everything is going to be okay," he said assuredly.

"I know" CAS closed his eyes and the next thing he knew he was being shaken away by a nurse   
"Mr. Novak, you can be discharged now. Your partner has your meds and creams. Any think like this happens again. Come straight in."

Dean waited for CAS a little ways away, but he stayed the whole time the other had been asleep. He had the dog clipped to a leash as well now, after she decided she wanted to guard the hall after CAS fell asleep. He heard what the doctor said and flushed red, but he didn't say anything. "Ready to go pick up the kids?"

CAS nodded and slowly sat up in the bed. "You'll have to help me to the car. My crutches are at home" CAS said home without even thinking about it   
"I mean, at yours"

Dean walked over to help him up, taking it as slow as the other needed. "It's your home now too, CAS," he told him. 

CAS didn't reply to this. Even though he trusted dean completely he was still terrified that he was just going to turn around and tell him to get out. Or even worse he would wake up in the flat in his Corner

He held a hand around CAS waist to help support him, the other holding onto his hand draped across his shoulders. He meant it about being CAS' home, and he'd show him that it really was. Somehow. 

"Harley, come" as CAS said it Harley came bounding after him, tongue lolling out of her mouth   
"Dean tonight...we should sit down and talk. We need to be completely honest with each other...flaws and all. Is that okay with you?"

That damn dog was listening to CAS better than she'd ever listened to Dean. As they walked Dean listened to what he said and bit his lip. "I think that's a good idea," Dean agreed, even though he hated getting too deep. They needed to do this though, for both of their sakes.

"If we don't know what the other has been though or experienced then this whole roommate thing won't work...and I really want this to work...for me as well as the kids ..."

"Yah, I know...and I completely agree," he said with a sure nod. Opening up to some-one wasn't something Dean did often...but for CAS it seemed like it wasn't going to be that big of a deal. 

CAS smiled as he reached the impala. It may seem he was okay to opening up but in reality he was shitting himself but he knew that he needed to in order to be on the same page as dean

Dean opened the passenger door to let CAS and Harley in before going around to his side. "Who do we go pick up first?" Dean asked as the engine revved to life. 

CAS settled into the passenger seat, with Harley in between his legs   
"Anna from nursery...she finishes first"

"Sounds good," he said, wondering who would be picking up Sam today. He pulled out of the hospital parking lot, deciding to take the route that would hopefully be less busy right now, if one or two minutes longer.

"And please...don't let her know about what happened today ...she's too young to wor-ry...if she asks say that I just slept funny ..."

"Yah, I won't say anything," he promised. He agreed a kid’s life should always be as worry free as possible. The rest of the drive flew by and they were soon pulling into the parking lot of the daycare. "They probably won't let me pick her up," he said, suddenly faced with a dilemma. He had wanted CAS to stay here and do as little as possible. 

"It's okay, it's only a short walk, and I’ll come with you” he smiled at dean before slowly getting out of the car   
"Ready?"

Dean nodded and hurried to the other side to help CAS out. He stood close by to sup-port him as they walked to the door as well, after double checking to make sure the windows were all rolled up and Harley couldn't escape again. They were nearly at the door when Sam ran up to them. "  
"Dean!" he shrieked in that little kid voice, wrapping his arms around Dean's legs before pulling back.   
Dean laughed and looked up to see his mom not far behind Sam.  
"Hey Hun," she said, only somewhat surprised, then looked to CAS with a bright smile, "And you must be Castiel. I'm Mary." She pulled him into a light hug before stepping back again, "You settling in alright? My boy treating you well?"

CAS winced as she pulled him into the hug but he played brave   
"Yes mam, he couldn't be treating me any better" he smiled as she saw Anna come bounding out

"Good. Let me know if not, okay?" She followed his gaze to the little girl coming up to them and she smiled, "You must be Anna. My Sam talks a lot about you."   
Dean ruffled Sam's hair before the boy walked up to Anna and whispered something into her ear. 

She stopped and looked at CAS before nodding "are you his mummy? Are you dean’s mummy?" She asked, as she stood next to Sam grinning

She chuckled softly at the two kids before nodding. "I sure am," she confirmed.   
Sam had a satisfied look plastered on his face as he looked at Anna again before back to his mom.

"It's very nice to meet you mommy Winchester" Anna smiled and then nudged Sam who nudged back and soon they was in a poking war

"We should probably go pick up the other two," Dean said as he considered what time it was.   
Mary smiled at the two young men in front of her, "Well we should all get together one of these days."

"That would be nice, I would love to meet the family of the man that saved my life ...but maybe when I'm a little better? I'm ...not exactly in the best health”

"Of course, honey. You take as long as you need, okay? Don't want to overwhelm you," Mary was quick to make sure he didn't feel pressured, "And if you ever need someone to take the kids for a while or anything I'd be happy to."

"Thank you...and I mean that...everything deans done for me...I don't think I would have managed any longer without him if I must be honest.." he looked at dean who was crouched talking to Anna and Sam

"Could say the same to you. I haven't seen Dean this open and...Happy, for a while. You must have made quite the impact on him," she watched her sons with a soft smile as Sam and Anna led him a little ways away to look at something with them, "So thank you, as well." 

"Honestly I can't take any credit...but hopefully. This is a new start for everyone...my main priority is the kids. Dad left them to me and do I'll ...do whatever ..."  
"Honestly I can't take any credit...but hopefully. This is a new start for everyone...my main priority is the kids. Dad left them to me and do I'll ...do whatever ..."

"One thing you learn when you've got kids in your care is they always come first," Mary agreed, "I'd say you've got that lesson down."

"Yea...well I promised my dad so...” CAS sighed and smiled

Dean had brought the two kids back now and looked at Cas, "Ready to go pick up your brothers?"

"Yea, hits that they will appreciate it. They never do" he smile and took hold of his sis-ter’s hand

"Nice meeting you, CAS," Mary said as she picked up Sam, "I'll see you again soon I'm sure." She then smiled at Dean.  
"See ya mom," he smiled back before going closer to CAS in case he needed help back to the car.

CAS linked his hands though deans and held on tight since it was the only support he had

Dean didn't mind holding onto CAS' hand, holding tight to let him know he wasn't going anywhere. Once they got to the car Dean helped CAS in before smiling slightly at him, "How're you doing?"

He glanced at Anna to make sure she wasn't listening and then spoke   
"Tired. Your mom is amazing by the way...I see where you get it from"

Dean ducked his head at that, a smile on his lips. He was so often compared to his fa-ther by people who knew his family...being like his mom was a pretty high compliment in his books. "She is pretty great," he agreed before going around to his side of the car and starting her up again. Harley had jumped in the backseat and from what he could see she was keeping Anna busy. 

"Mm mm I do love the sound of this car...that purr...makes a man want to close his eyes and weep" he laughed

Dean pulled out of the parking lot and grinned at Castiel's comment. "When you're all better I'll have to let you drive her," he said, always overly glad when someone loved his car as much as he did. 

"Really? CAS was surprise dean would even trust him with the car. It was such a beau-tiful vehicle that if it was his he could be terrified contently about crashing

Dean hardly let anyone drive his car, even his dad who it technically belonged to. But here he was offering it willingly to CAS. "Yah, I trust you," Dean said with a quick smile towards Castiel before looking back to the road.

"I'll...I'll drive it when I'm stronger because I don’t want to crash..." he smiled back at dean

Dean nodded with a grin as they pulled up outside of the twins' school. "Will they come out or should one of us go get them?" he asked.

"They will come out ...I texted Luci so he'll know where I am”

"Awesome," Dean nodded, putting the car in park to wait for them. "How you doing' back there, Anna?"

CAS looked around and saw Anna asleep leaving against the dog   
"She's asleep dean..." CAS smiled at his little sister

 

Dean turned around to look and he smiled softly at the sleeping girl. "She looks like you, hey?" Dean marveled, some of her features very similar to that of her older brother.

"Yes but she has my mother’s hair ...I got my dad’s ...but the boys …all blond ish from my grandad, she also got moms freckles " CAS sat straight again just as the boys got into the car

Dean listened to CAS until the twins got in. "Hey guys," he said with a grin towards the two.

"Hey dean" mike said with a smile but lucid hadn't said anything yet

Dean looked at them both before he started to drive. "Should we set up the video game stuff when we get back?" he asked them.

Mike nodded at dean a smile on his face but Luci was still quiet   
"Luci...you okay?" Luci said nothing

Dean bit his lip. He could sense that the middle boy might be keeping something in. He wasn't his family however, so he didn't want to make the kid seem like he was pushing too much. Instead he glanced at CAS, his expression slightly worried. 

CAS sighed looking at his younger brother in the mirror then to dean. He quickly changed the subject "so we'll get the games set up and for Anna, how about we bake cookies?”

Dean nodded a smile finding his lips, "Yah, we can do that."

 

"Okay then we need to stop off at Walmart but if we go the long way we can get my crutches, is that okay dean?" CAS asked, hoping he would say yes

"Of course," he said, then sent a worrying glance at Castiel, "You sure you're okay? I can take them and go to the store." He really didn't want CAS to strain himself. 

"I'm fine dean, Walmart is a small store ...I can handle it ..." he said just as they pulled up to the house   
"Mike, can you get my crutches.”  
Mike simply nodded and jumped out and went to get his crutches

Dean frowned, not fully convinced. He'd have to take Castiel's word for it though, be-cause he did say he trusted him after all, "Well, let me know if you change your mind." 

"I will dean, now stop worrying " CAS rolled his eyes just as mike put the crutches in the boot and climbing into the back   
"Ready?"

Dean couldn't help it. Worrying about those he cared about was in his blood. "Sorry," he murmured before turning on the car and pulling out again, eyes trained on the road ahead. 

"Dean...” CAS rested his hand on dean’s knee temporarily   
"Thank you dean. I know you’re just looking out for me"

CAS had nearly died today...so he thought his worries were justified. He shot a smile towards CAS, "I like you, CAS. I want to make sure you're okay." 

Castile’s heart kept when dean said that but it obviously meant hit as a friend  
"I like you too dean...I'll be okay ...I promise”

Dean nodded as they neared the store. "Okay," he said, believing Castiel. 

CAS took the crutches from his brother and then they stopped he slowly got himself out of the car

Dean looked at CAS and his brother and then to Anna sleeping in the back. "Want me to stay here with her?" he asked. 

CAS nodded   
"Please, I don't really want to wake her up" CAS straighten his shirt   
"I'll be as quick as I can"

 

Dean watched CAS go for a moment, glad that his brothers were there to help him. The car was quiet now as he looked to the sleeping girl in the back.

It was a couple of minutes before Anna woke up, her tiny body shaking and obviously scared

Dean kept glancing back at her to make sure she was okay when he suddenly heard Harley whining. As soon as he saw the state she was in he hopped out and got into the backseat, his movements slow in case she was still half asleep. "Hey, Anna, sweet-heart, are you okay?" he said softly, mildly panicked but trying not to let it show. 

Anna saw dean and backed herself into the corner of the impala. Her face was raw with tears and her hair was a wild mess   
"W-where's c-Cas?" She asked, Harley nudging her with her nose. Anna was confused as where she was. Sometimes her bad dreams would confuse her like this

Dean wasn't an expert with kids. All he knew was what he had learned from being with his little brother. He tried to approach this as calmly as he could. "Your brother just went in the store, he'll be right back," he told her, voice still quiet, trying to say the most comforting things he could, "Did you have a bad dream? It's all okay now. See? Harley's worried about you too. She won't let anything hurt you."

Anna moved a little closer to Harvey to nudged her again   
"It was scary dean...I dreamed of the fire ... and my brother was stuck and he couldn't get out. Then the fire turned into a monster that kept chasing CAS around ..." Anna was confused about the dream she had because to her it made no sense. But to dean it did.   
"And then there was a man in shining armor fighting the monster so it didn't get to CAS anymore"   
Anna was describing the last few months of the family's life.   
How they lost their brother in the fire. How the pain both physical and mental follow them around like a monster and ...dean. The one who is doing all he can to save the distressed family. After all. He's the knight in shining armor

Dean listened when a frown on his face and understanding in his eyes as he gave all his attention to the little girl.   
"It was all a dream, sweetheart," he assured, his heart hurting for her having to endure so much at such a young age.  
"You're safe now," Dean said, offering her a soft smile.

She nodded but held her arms out to dean for him to pull her into his arms. She was scared and with CAS trusting dean completely so did she. She had already accepted dean

Dean hadn't been sure if she was comfortable with him so as soon as she held out her arms he picked her up and held her close, letting her bury her face in his neck. He rubbed her back as he sank against the backseat of the Impala. Because he thought it might be comforting, he started humming softly, and telling her over and over that she was safe. 

Anna found this smoothing. Before the fire CAS used to sing her to sleep every night. It would be a new song every time but her favorite would always be hey Jude   
"Cas used to sing me to sleep ..." she said, her voice muffled by deans neck

"He's a good big brother like that, isn't he?" He murmured to Anna, who was probably still sleepy, "Once he's all better I'm sure he will again." 

"I hope so ...I don't like CAS sad...it makes Luci said and when Luci is said he doesn't want to do anything” she nuzzled into dean, her voice getting quieter   
"You make Cas happy though, he smiled yesterday ..."

"Yah? Well hopefully we can get him to smile more. Maybe that'll be our little mission, hey? Just between you and me?" he said, letting his voice lower to the same level as hers. 

She nodded again   
" he likes cat videos and his tigllish spot is at the base of his neck but it's burn right now ... and he always laughs at the Kermit the frog sound " towards the end her voice dropped off as she slipped back into a sleep , deans body heat keeping her warm

Dean listened intently to the information she was giving him. "Good to know. Thank you, Anna," he said as he felt her body relax meaning she must have fallen back asleep. In-stead of putting her back in her seat he just stayed sitting where he was until Castiel and his brothers came back. 

It was at least 15 minutes before CAS and the boys came back. CAS got mike to put the food in the boot before getting back into the car where he noticed dean   
"Dean? You okay?"

Dean nodded slightly, moving as little as possible to put Anna back in her seat. He got out and let the boys in before getting back in the driver's seat. "She had a bad dream," he told Castiel, keeping his voice low. 

"She did?” CAS sighed looking back at his sister   
"I should have been here...did she say anything? " he asked curiously

Dean looked at Anna as well and shook his head slightly. "Not much," he said, deciding against telling him the details of the conversation, "She seemed okay when she fell back asleep though." 

"Okay...I'll see if she wants to talk later ...let's get these lot back ... it's hot and every-one is tired”  
CAS lent back into the seat, Harley now in between dean and CAS, happily panting

Dean could agree with that. Relaxing would probably be good for everyone. He looked at the kids in the mirror and CAS beside him. It was all not an image he'd picture the day before yesterday, but he wouldn't have it any other way. 

It was a quick drive home and when they did mike and Luci took the food into the house without being asked, as car climbed out the dog was close to his side   
"Hey dean, can you carry Anna please..."

"Of course," Dean said with a smile, going to the back door and undoing her seatbelt, the. Lifting Anna out of her seat and into his arms. He held her close and hoped she wouldn't wake up as they walked inside, letting CAS go first. 

Anna didn't even stir as she was carried into her new room and tucked into her bed   
CAS stood at the door way, watching dean close as he did   
"Thank you Dean”

Dean made sure Anna was comfortable before walking back to CAS, finding himself standing fairly close to the other. "Not a problem," he said with a smile. 

CAS didn't move back as dean came close, they were barely 2 foot apart  
"She really has taken a shine to you hasn’t she ..." CAS said, in a low voice. The door frame supporting him

Dean found his eyes taking in Castiel's face, which was hard not to do given the close proximity they had to one another. "She's a good kid," Dean said quietly with a glance back towards Anna. He'd be lying if he said he didn't feel like he clicked with her too. 

"A good kid that's swimming against a current of odds ..." CAS sighed, his eyes flicking to deans plump lips and he found himself licking his own

"She's going to be okay," he said, very confident that she would be, "All of them will be." He watched Castiel's eyes and found himself looking at Cas' lips in turn as well, the bathroom scene this morning rushing back into his brain. "You're taking my bed to-night," Dean told him, not leaving room for discussion. 

"But dean that's not fair on you. I can't take your own bed" CAS tried to argue but he tried to keep his voice low

Dean stepped out into the hall and shook his head. "You nearly died today," he said in a hushed tone, "You're taking my bed."

"Correction...I did die...y-you brought me back ..." CAS balanced himself on the crutch-es   
"Fine. Looks like I'm not going to win this conversation so I'll take your bed. But just for tonight”

Dean smiled softly, glad he got through to him. "Good. Glad that's settled."

"Well , you’re not going to give me the option but I know your just looking out for me so...thanks ..." he slowly and quietly shut the door behind him

"Always a pleasure, Cas," he said with another bright smile. "Want to come out to the living room while I set the system up for the boys?"

"I was actually going to bath, maybe you can have some bonding time with the boys? They need someone other than there little sister and cripple brother to talk to you know?”

"Sure, that sounds good," Dean said. He wasn't sure how the brothers liked him...but he hoped well enough. "You sure you'll be okay on your own?" he asked, slightly con-cerned Castiel might fall or something. 

"Yes dean, I think I can manage to take a bath on my own okay? Now stop worrying “Cas leant his crutches just outside the bathroom door and grabbed his pgs.  
"If I need help I'll call but I'll be fine. Promise”

Dean bit his lip before nodding. "Yah, okay," he said, satisfied enough, he then walked down the hall a little ways to the door of the boys room and knocked. "Hey guys, want to set it up now?" 

"Yes please dean. I've been trying to do it but lucid isn't helping “he gestured to the top bunk where Luci was buried deep under the blankets

Dean nodded slightly and walked into the room and closer to the top bunk, "Hey man, everything okay? Do you need to talk?"

"Leave me alone" he mumbled though the blankets and he turned to face the wall. Mike sighed shaking his head at dean to say there wasn't any point

Dean sighed and shared a look with Mike. "Alright, buddy. But if you need something we'll be getting it hooked up to the two in the living room, okay?" He said, not wanting to leave the room without trying and leaving it open ended. He then looked to Mike and nodded towards the living room, "Comin'?" 

Mike followed dean closely, his jumper baggy around him   
"Luci does this sometimes” he said as they entered the living room   
"H...he misses our old life...”

Dean knelt down to get the stuff from the stand underneath the to. He listened to Mike the whole time, frowning. "That's understandable. Does he talk to you about it?" 

Mike shook his head   
"He doesn't talk to anyone except his girlfriend...but even she's being pushed away. He was very close with Gabe...he's taking it hard. Castile’s mood affects him...I don't know why..." he kilt down next to dean

Dean shook his head. These kids dealt with far more than they ever needed to at their age. "How about you? How are you dealing with it all?" he asked the dark haired boy. 

Mike shrugged then looked at dean   
"I try and keep it together ...CAS doesn't need someone else to look after...” he reached over and took the cream off the side, knowing he'll have to put it on his broth-ers back

"Don't keep it bottled in too long," he advised, "You need time to grieve too, Mike." 

"I know just not yet okay? It's not my time yet ..." mike diverted his eyes for a second so he didn't have to look at deans reactions

Dean nodded softly, "Okay, just let me know if you ever need someone to talk to. I might not be able to relate, but I sure as hell can listen." 

"Thank you dean ...I'll keep that in mind” he smiled and handed dean the HDMI lead to dean

Dean smiled back at him before taking the cord and plugging it in. "So, what kind of things are you into?" he asked as he fiddled with the cords and remote, getting it all where it needed to be.

"If I had to be honest...I am quite a nerd...I like books and films...to shows that sort of stuff " mike shrugged, fairly embarrassed

Dean's eyes brightened. He couldn't say books were his strong point, but movies and shows were right up Dean's alley. "Oh yah? What's your favorite movie?"

"I can't just pick one, there's too many that I love. I can't just pick one “mike looked at dean, noticing the light up in his eyes and he really felt like he was making a connection

Dean chuckled, "Yah, I guess it's pretty hard to pick." He ran a hand through his hair and tilted his head, "How about a top three that you really enjoyed?" 

"Well...Les mis ... fantastic beasts and where to find them and...Life which is the new one with Ryan Reynolds in it”

 

"Mm, Ryan Reynolds," Dean said with slightly heightened interest. Usually he wasn't one for celebrity crushes, never mind a dude...but /Ryan Reynolds/. "You see Dead pool?" he quizzed. 

"You like Ryan? I suppose he's..." he stopped himself say hot. He spent 4 years trying to convince everyone he wasn't gay. Even CAS didn't know. Only Gabriel.   
Gabriel was in a relationship with Balzafar his "best friend" which only mike knew. They both had suspicions about CAS but they wouldn't know because the poor boy hadn't even had his first kiss yet. 

"He's a good actor ...and yes I have seen dead pool...I went to see it with Gabe" Mike smiled a little

"I bet that was fun," Dean said softly, expression hiding some sadness behind him. He was certain the kid missed his other older brother like hell, and he couldn't even imagine what it was like.

"It was...we went to get ice cream afterwards” mikes voice become more quiet and he changed the subject   
"Any way...I..." he quickly turned away because he knew he started crying

Dean felt a lump in his throat. Seeing kids cry was not something he dealt with well. Not even thinking twice, Dean pulled the boy into a hug, not saying anything in fear of po-tentially crying himself.

Mike didn't even protest when dean pulled him into his arms. Mike gripped him back tightly and it was like the flood gates were opening. He cried into dean’s chest for all he has lost in the last five years. He cried for his parents. He cried for the loss of his best friend and brother .He cried because every day when he woke up he had to see his older brother in agony because of his fuck up   
He cried because everything he has lost or given up had been kept to himself .he tried to stop himself crying because he could hear Cas moving around in the bath but he couldn't

Dean held him tighter if possible, memories of just a couple hours ago with Anna in the car. His hand rubbed his back soothingly, letting the young make cry. "Its okay, let it out," he said quietly.

Mike took a deep breath and sat up, wiping his eyes   
"No I can’t, Cas might hear" he took a deep breath, putting on a brave face

Dean frowned at that. He was sure Castiel wouldn't want Mike to keep his feelings hid-den. He decided not to push anything further, however, and put a hand on the kid's shoulder, "I'm here anytime you want to talk. Okay?"

 

He very quickly changed the subject very quickly  
"Do you have sims 4 on this thing? If not can we get it? I really want it”

Dean let it slide, not pressing his limits. "I think I do. Check the drawer there," he said, pointing to the closed drawer under the TV as he finished plugging in all the cords.

Mike did and his eyes lit up. "You have it!” he was like a little kid at Christmas   
"And the expansion packs!”

Dean smiled, the grin reaching his eyes as he watched the happiness on Mike's face. "Here you go, all set up," he said as he handed him the controller. 

Mike put the controller next to him and threw his arms around dean neck just as CAS came limping out the bath room. He saw them and smiled. Continuing on to dean room where he was told to get changed   
"Thank you dean!”

Dean smiled at the kid, "No problem, and buddy!" He was glad he could give the kid something that made him happy. He looked over to CAS when he came back, "Feeling better?"

CAS sunk into the sofa slowly and nodded   
"A Little yes ...dean...I hate to ask but...would you mind cooking? I got some stuff from the shop earlier but my legs are killing at the moment “he smiled at mikes face as he set up the Sims

"Planning on doing it anyways," he assured with a grin, making sure Mike was all settled before standing up off the floor. "I'm going to get started, you just relax," he told him with a wink.

"There's not really much I can do except watch ..." as dean walked away he did watch. He loved the way dean wore slightly tighter jeans that hugged his buttocks and thighs. CAS sighed and let his head fall against the sofa. He really needed to tell dean how he felt.

Dean started pulling things out of the cupboards and the fridge, humming to himself as he turned on the stove. "What do you guys want?" he then asked, not sure if what he was going to make would be okay.

"Burgers? I brought some fresh meat but...do you know how to make fresh burgers? If not, I can get a chair and help?" CAS suggested. Unsure if dean even wanted him to help.

"I know how to do it," Dean assured him. "You could come supervise to make sure I'm doing it right though...if you want."  
CAS nodded, grabbing his crutches and hobbled to dean, standing just behind him   
"Do you know how to knead the meat?" CAS asked smirking a little

Dean rolled his eyes at CAS' little smirk. "Maybe..." he shrugged, almost sure he could manage to figure it out on his own but not wanting to admit he didn't know how at all.

"Alright, I can show you.” CAS put his crutches aside. Right now he didn't care about the pain he would be in later   
"Hold out your hands like this" CAS took hold of dean’s hands and opened the Parms. Deans looked so ...clean next to his burnt hands

Dean's eyes were transfixed on the gentle way Castiel held his hands. He held them open, looking up for the next instructions from the younger male.

CAS positioned his hands on deans, lowering them slowly. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest. His breath making the hairs on dean’s neck stand on end.   
"Just like this ..." he whispered

Dean was hardly paying attention to actually doing what CAS told him. The closeness was enough to make Dean Flashback to earlier when Castiel had taken him surprise and kissed him. He almost wished he hadn't just brushed it off.

"Now what you want to do it kneed the meat. To mix it together effectively “Cas entan-gled his fingers between deans and pushed down so dean would start taking controls but CAS being a guide

"Exactly like that” he could feel dean’s hands moving with his and he tried to control his heart beat, knowing dean would be able to feel it though his fingers

Dean unintentionally leaned into CAS' chest a little as he continued what he was shown, slowing his breath so he could feel the man whose arms were around him. Suddenly it didn't feel like they were just making burgers. 

CAS couldn't breathe now. His chest tightened and his belly fluttered. He never knew he could feel like this with anyone. Up until he met dean Winchester he didn't even know if he was capable to loving someone romantically or sexually and now there was this...man that had a heart of pure gold and was hot as hell pushing back against him as he was being taught how to make Castiles homemade burgers. It was a scene he never imagined himself in

Dean's breath got caught in his throat as he took his hands away, turning around with hands in the air so he didn't touch CAS now that they were covered in meat and what not. He found himself face to face with the other then, a lot closer than expected with CAS arms still around him. For a moment it was a pause, one where nothing was said, and nothing needed to be. 

CAS was taken back when dean was turned around and suddenly he was inches away from his face. This was it. A chance with dean where it wasn’t rushed or while him was practically dyeing.   
He closed the gap between their lips.   
He was centimeters away and suddenly the door flew open, mike walking in   
"Deannnnnn , the Xbox is frozen " he complained destroying the moment between him and dean

Dean was ready this time, and wasn't going to pull away, tilting his head slightly. When Mike walked in his eyes shot up and he moved away from CAS to the sink, turning it on with his elbow before he started washing his hands. "Try turning it on and off again," he said, leaning against the counter as casually as he could. 

Mike looked between the two adults an eyebrow raised. He noticed the sudden move-ments as he walked into the room and he feared he ruined a moment   
"Thanks ...I'll try that..." he said even though he tried it already. 5 times

"And if that doesn't work, unplugging the colored cords in the back maybe?" he kept suggesting, afraid the kid was catching onto what he had possibly interrupted. 

"Okay I will try" he backed out of the room, closing the door behind him.   
CAS sighed picked up his crutches again, just to keep the weight off his legs

Dean smiled apologetically at CAS before going to the fridge and getting some more stuff out they'd need. He watched CAS out of the corner of his eyes as he moved about the kitchen, feeling like he should say something, but instead it stretched into an awk-ward silence between them. 

CAS didn't know what to say either. Instead he busied himself making the kids pack lunches for the next day, hoping dean would break the silence

CAS just stood there trying not to laugh. Was dean ....flustered? CAS smirked as dean   
"Maybe later" he said, quite quickly after dean spoke

Dean stared at CAS for a moment, blinking before he remembered to breath. "Cas," he started, pausing an awhile before gesturing between them, "Us. Are we...is there...something?" He struggled, never being one that was good with words.

Luckily CAS was already leaning again the counter. He couldn't take all this ...tension anymore so he reached forward, grabbing dean by the shirt and pulled him forwards so that their chests were pressed together , their lips centimeters away again .   
"Yes..." he whispered softly

Dean was gentle as he could as he put his hands on Castiel's hips, not needing more than that one 'yes'. It wasn't all in his head after all. He leaned closer to his lips, ghost-ing over Castiel's as their noses bumped together softly, testing and making sure it was okay he closed the distance. 

CAS closed that last little gap, pushing their lips together for the second time that day but this time was different. Even though it had been a short amount of time it seemed him and dean had got to know each other better. This just sparked the flame.   
CAS was no expert at this. Not that dean knew but this would be his first kiss. He didn't know what to do with his lips. Or his hand. He hoped dean would take charge.

This was new to Dean. He'd never kissed another guy before. His hand went to the back of Castiel's head to keep him close, keeping the kiss light but still pressing further, not worried about coming up from air. 

About half way though the kiss CAS had figured out that would had to breathe though his nose. After that he picked it up quickly, copying the movement of dean’s lip. He would fell dean’s hand on the top of his neck and he flinched a little. He hated people touching his neck especially since the fire. But dean? He didn't mind   
He just lost himself in deans arms, their lips tangled together

Dean melted completely, knowing he told himself to avoid this situation...but maybe it was unavoidable. As he pulled away, he didn't go far, leaning his forehead against Castiel's. His heart beat faster, a soft smile tugging at his lips. 

"I would say that was unexpected but...I've wanted to do that ever since I've laid eyes on you ..." he sighed, his hands still on dean’s waist. He loved the closeness. How dean rested his forehead on Castiles.

Dean's arms stayed around the other, hanging loose so as not to hurt him. Reality crashed into him as he brought one hand to caress Castiel's cheek. "Cas," he breathed, not pulling away from the other, "Whatever this is...relationships...feeling and me...it never ends well. I don't want to hurt you."

"After everything that I've been enough dean...these past months...you’re the only one that make me hopeful...” he leaned into dean’s soft pain

Dean closed his eyes and rested his forehead back on Castiel's, breathing slow and fo-cused. "You're doing amazing, CAS," he said reassuringly, because he didn't really feel like he deserved any credit besides giving them a new place to live. 

"Only because of you. You've given me something to..." CAS didn't know how to ex-press his words. He hand his hands resting on deans waist, his fingers brushing over the exposed skin

"Can't say you haven't made a huge difference in my life either," Dean mused, because that was true. His life completely turned upside down and he wouldn't have it any other way. He was still afraid of being romantically involved with the younger male however. 

"I don't see how that's possible dean, expect for ...taking up some rooms and ...well now this...” he pushed his hands further up deans shirt but ever so slightly so dean did-n't notice

Dean smiled softly. "That's exactly it. I would've never let anyone else just move in like that. Ever since the day I pulled you out of that building I knew there was something about you I couldn't just let go. I...you're amazing," he breathed. He didn't care how many times he said it because it was true, CAS was amazing. 

"It seems that we have been drifting towards Each other" he smirked. It sounded ridicu-lous but it seemed true   
"So...what are we going to do about this ...about us?”

Dean ran a hand up and down Castiel's shoulder, as light as possible, his other hand snaked to his back to hold him close. "I...I don't know," he frowned, "I think we need to take things slow. I don't want to overwhelm your siblings, or you."   
He leaned their foreheads together again, "How about when you're all healed up, I take you on a date?" he murmured softly.

"It's going to take a least another couple of months for all this to heal...and there will always be scarring. But its fine...I think I Rock the two faces look" he joked, enjoying the gentle touch on his skin and how dean was holding him close

"Then how about then? Scars or not, you're still the guy I want to take out," he said, because he didn't care about the scars on Castiel's body, he just wanted to make sure he was feeling better and in the right space to go on a date in the first place.

"I would like that" CAS answered softly, his hands still brushing over the skin under dean’s shirt   
"I've never been on a date before...you’re two of my firsts ..." he chuckled slightly

"You should take it as a honor Dean Winchester ...your my first kiss" he let himself kiss him back a little more before pressing his lips to his jaw line , his hands debating whether to attempt to pull of the other males shirt

Dean shivered under Castiel's touch, pressing one quick kiss to his jaw before pulling back. "You're siblings could walk in any second," he pointed out, still smiling however.

"Mm mm I suppose we should Finnish these burgers ..." he removed his hands from dean’s shirt and straightened out his hair.   
"I should wake Anna otherwise she won't sleep tonight " he picked up his crutches, his lips still pink and swollen from their passionate kiss

Dean watched Castiel, just able to catch his breath as all the current events rushed into his head. "Alright," he said with a nod, "I can finish in here if you want to go get her."

CAS winked at him and left the room, running straight into mike who was smiling like an idiot.   
"What are you smiling at...?” CAS tried to act casual

Mike shrugged, over exaggerating the gesture as he smirked at his older brother. "Oh...nothing," he said casually, "What are /you/ smiling about?"

"What? I don't know what you’re talking about" CAS replied, clearly flustered. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand   
"I'm not smiling." Even though he knew he was

"I'm old enough to know about 'kissing', you know?" Mike said back, raising an eyebrow at CAS and still smiling mischievously.

"Kissing, I wasn't kissing anyone." It was clear that he wasn't fooling anyone and the fact he kept stuttering wasn't helping

"Whatever you say, CAS," Mike said holding up a hand in defeat, knowing his brother wouldn't admit it to him.   
He went back to sit on the couch before adding something, "Dean would make a pretty cool brother in-law though."

CAS couldn't help but smiled at this and replied softly   
"He would wouldn't he..."

Suddenly it went beyond teasing and when Mike looked at his brother his smile changed as well. "Are you happy here, Cas?"

"I would be lying if I said I wasn't" he decided to sit next to his younger brother   
"Are you?" He asked in return

Mike crossed his legs and sat back I the couch more, "I am. Like...really happy." He couldn't remember a time he felt all his worries this light on his shoulders.

"Well ...we're going to be staying for a while. I’m glad you’re happy" he leaned into his brother, placing a kiss on the top of his brothers blond hair

"Yah, well I'm glad you are too," Mike said, throwing his arms around his brother in a hug.

He hugged him back and broke the hug   
"I need to go and get your sister up otherwise she is going to keep us all up tonight...” he chuckled and pulled himself painfully to his feet

"Alright," Mike said, picking up the video game controller again, "I thought I'd be able to stay up late anyways since its Saturday."

"One, you can stay up late tonight, but mike you went to school today ...it's Friday " he sniggered and rolled his eyes

"Whatever man," Mike mumbled, not wanting to outright admit his mistake, but he had a smirk on his lips anyways.

CAS chuckled to himself as he limped out of the room and into annals room   
"Anna, it's time to wake up sweetie”

Anna blinked a few times before stretching her little arms above her head. "Is it break-fast time yet?" she asked sleepily.

"No it's dinner time sweetheart, you fell asleep in the car" he sat on the bed at her feet   
"Dean said you had a little nightmare ...did you want to talk to me about it?"

"Okay ...deans making my special burgers, and if you eat all your food there's desert." It had been a good few weeks since they had all had something like desert but without paying anything towards rent or any responsibility CAS decided to treat the kids. Just for this month then he will contribute to the house hold

"Yay!" she squeaked, grabbing her stuffed animal and heading out the bedroom door. She stopped by her brother in the living room, "Hi, Mikey."

"Hello my fair lady” he tipped his pretended hat to her as CAS then went into the boy’s room   
"Hey Luci ...dean said you would talk...want to talk to be about it?" He asked doping the lost twin would

Luci glared at his older brother when he looked up from his phone. "Not really," he said, sinking back into his pillow. "Why would you care anyways," he muttered.

"Because I care about you? You’re my brother and it's my responsibility go look after you”

Luci rolled his eyes. "I can look after myself," he grumbled, eyes glued to the screen of his phone. 

"So you can cook, clean, pay the rent can you?" CAS put all his body weight onto the crutches, his legs aching

Luci looked away miserably. "Not like you can either. I didn't ask to move in here with your stupid crush, Castiel," he narrowed his eyes, "He probably just feels bad for you, that's the only reason he's letting us live here."

"Luci! What the hell is gotten into you? How dare you talk to me like that “anger bubbled up in Castile’s chest at how his brother was talking to him?   
"I do everything to benefit you and your siblings. I'm doing my best I can okay?! I've been looking after you all after mom and dad died.   
5 years. I was still just a teenager so how dare you”

"Obviously you didn't do your best because Gabe is dead, CAS!" he sat up suddenly, nostrils flaring. 

CAS felt like he had been punched in the gut. He blamed himself for what happened to Gabriel but for his other brothers to. That was something   
"I...I didn't know he was in the bathroom Luci! He was meant to be in New York!"

Luci crossed his arms, staying silent and looking away as his eyes burned. Maybe it wasn't fair to blame his older brother, but he wasn't exactly one to think straight under pressure. 

CAS couldn't help but let the tears flow. He would never cry in front of those he cared for but after what his brother just said. He could help it   
He turned on his heals as he started to sob

CAS quickly walked past dean into dean’s room and fell onto the bed sobbing, his crutches abandoned at the side of the queen sized bed

Dean's heart twisted and he went into the boy’s room. "Hey, kid, come on," he said, try-ing to stay calm and not giving him an option of otherwise, walking out towards the front door.

Luci turned to look at dean with red puffy eyes, his nose running   
"Leave me alone” he grumbled but let dean genteelly push him

Dean shut the front door. "Remind me how old you are?" he asked after a moment, watching the young boy with tears in his eyes.

"Six-Teen" he stuttered, flinching at the sound on the door closing behind him. He re-gretted saying what he said to CAS but he was so angry

"I know things are way harder for you right now than they should be," Dean started, "You've got to give your brother a break though. He's doing everything he can to hold things together for you, bud." 

"I know I'm just...so angry and when I get angry I can't control it anymore" he fiddled with his thumbs   
"I try ...but CAS always gets the back end of my anger"

Dean frowned, trying to put himself in Luci's shoes. "Things look bad now, I know. It's going to get better, and it's still going to hurt...but eventually, you're going to be able to live with it," he tried offering any advice he had.

He shook his head   
"I don't want to live with it..." he said starting to tear up again   
"Not without him...I don't want to”

Dean sat down on the steps with the boy, his own voice strained and his eyes red, "I know. I know it's hard, okay? And I know it feels like you'll never be the same, like a part of you is missing. You have to think about what your brother would want you to do. Would he want you to spend your life mourning him, or keep living your life the way you want to?" 

What dean was saying was exactly how he felt. Every work he related to   
"Yes ...that's exactly how I feel...."

Dean smiled weakly, running his hand through his hair. "We might have more in com-mon than you think, Luci," he said softly, all the things he'd suppressed suddenly rush-ing to the surface. "I had another brother as well."

"You had a brother?” he asked, a little shocked that dean neglected to tell this to them before hand

Dean looked up at the sky and didn't say anything for a while. Then he looked at Luci, nodding, "Yah. I did. Twin brother. His name was Adam."

"You had a twin?” he asked a little surprised at this   
"What happened? Did you fall out?"

Dean ran it through his head a few times, trying to figure out how to tell Luci what he hadn't told anyone in years.   
"He died in a car accident when we were fourteen."

"Oh I ...I didn't know ..." he whispered, guilt flooding him. He know how it felt to lose a twin and it felt like someone had just ripped out a part of you

"I don't really tell anyone," Dean said, "It hurts like hell, and it does for a long time, but it gets easier over time, Luci." 

"It feels like this will never get easier” he was clearly choked up as he talked however he appreciated how dean was telling him this

Dean frowned and put a hand on the boy's shoulder. "I know. For a while you just need to let it hurt," he said softly. 

"But I don’t want it to hurt dean, I ..." his head hung between his shoulders, as he start-ed to cry again

Dean wasn't sure how comfortable Luci was, so instead of hugging him he gently rubbed his back. "It's okay," he said softly.

Luci didn't care right now. When dean rubbed his back he lent onto his side. He felt a sudden connection with dean. Since they shared the same trauma   
"Sorry I was rude...” he whispered

Dean shook his head slightly, "It’s okay. You are under a lot of pressure lately. I get it. Just remember your brother is feeling the same way, too."

Luci still felt guilty about what he said but nodded   
"You should properly go talk to Cas ..." he sat up straight and wiped his face   
"I'll talk to him later ..."

"Okay, but don't put it off," Dean said as he stood up again, "Otherwise it'll turn out the exact same as what just happened." 

Luci said nothing and just nodded as dean headed back to CAS who was in the kitchen struggling to finished the dinner that dean started

"Cas?" Dean said, the other's back to him. "Hey, you okay?" he asked softly.

CAS stepped away from the rest of the food and shook his head  
"I can't Finnish this ..."  
CAS was stood at the stove trying to fry up the burgers but he was struggling to get the heavy pan onto the cooker. The heavy Metal weighing the pan now

Dean stepped forward to help, taking the stuff from CAS' hands and putting it where it needed to be. "You don't have to," he said softly, "I'll look after it."

"The kids were hungry and I felt useless just..." he looked away from dean, a light smile on his face but it was clear that whatever Luci had said it got to him

Dean stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, you're not useless. You're doing everything you can for those kids," he said seriously.

"But clearly it isn't enough because you could hear what Luci was saying. He blames me and what's to say that they all don’t. “He looked at dean pitifully

"Cas. You listen to me," Dean said, putting both his hands on either side of Castiel's face so he was looking him in the eyes, "They don't. Okay, they know it's not your fault. The situation you guys are in is shit, and it's going to be shit for a while, and more feel-ings are going to be hurt, but it's going to get better." 

"From what Luci was saying it's clear they do. And he's right. It is my fault. I should have known he was in there. I should have found him. It's my fault he's not standing with us today. My fault.”

"Cas!" Dean said, voice a little louder as he listened to the other putting himself down, "Let's say it is your fault, which it isn't, there's nothing you can do about it now. It's in the past. It's not something that can be fixed. You have to forgive yourself, then they will too. Okay?" 

"Forgive myself? Dean I can’t. I'm the reason this happened. I'm the reason the fire started! Your boss said so himself!" It was clear CAS was getting distressed but he was telling the truth about dean’s boss

Dean frowned, one of his hands moving to the back of CAS' neck, his thumb moving in small circles to attempt and calm him down. "Hey, listen to me, you need to relax," he said, lowering his voice. 

CAS could feel dean’s thumbs turning circles on his neck and he calmed a little. He leaned forwards resting his forehead on dean’s shoulder and he talked quietly   
"S-sorry dean..."

"Shah, don't apologize to me," he said, wrapping his other arm around the other as he gently kissed the top of his head. 

CAS gave himself a couple of moments to calm down then he lifted his head from dean’s shoulder   
"All that needs doing is the food being dished up"

Dean looked into Castiel's tired eyes and nodded. "Don't worry, I'll finish. You need some rest," he said gently.

"I always need rest apparently” he grumbled but turned around anyway   
"I'll set the table and get the kids at said table”

Dean frowned at the other and nodded softly, "Okay." He then turned to finish getting the food ready. 

CAS walked slowly to the table, calling the three children to the table as he set it   
"We have burgers tonight." He said

Dean brought the food to the table shortly after all the kids were seated, smiling at each of them. “Eat up, guys,” he said, trying to sound as happy as he could, “You too, CAS.”

CAS rolled his eyes at dean and dug in   
He wait till most of the children's food was gone before he really started to eat and he finished his plate of food within minutes 

"Cas! You said we need to chew our food when we ate" Anna folded her arms stub-bornly

Dean looked at CAS and shook his head slightly at him, a fond smile on his lips at An-na’s comment. “She’s got a point, sweetheart,” he said as he sat across from him.

Mike looked up from his dinner trying not to laugh 

CAS too raised a brow   
"Sweetheart?" He questioned with a smirk

The attention on him suddenly had heat rushing to his cheeks. Dean called a lot of peo-ple sweetheart, so he didn’t really think anything of it until he was called out on it. He just shrugged and turned to the food on his plate. “Sorry, he murmured.”

CAS smiled reassuringly at dean to let him know he wasn't bothered by the nickname much   
"No it's okay ...I like it ..." he looked at his siblings who were grinning like mad

Dean just smiled a little at Castiel in response, then looked at the kids who were proba-bly trying to hold in their laughter, making him laugh softly.

"But okay, I'll try and eat my food little slower ...happy?” he asked, slowing down on the last few bits on burger and chips

Dean smiled contently at him, nodding, "Yup." He went back to his own food then, chuckling softly.

He rolled his eyes again and looked at Anna who giggled at what he was mouthing then got up from her seat and plodded over to dean. She tugged at his shirt, forcing him to go to her level

Dean shared an amused glance with CAS before he leaned down and smiled at the little girl, “What is it?” 

Anna leaned forward a little and placed a kiss on dean’s cheek.  
"That's from Cas” she whispered

Dean felt heat rise to his cheeks again before chuckling and whispering in her ear, “Well, tell him thank you for me, yah?” 

She nodded, skipping over to CAS and said what dean told her to. CAS also blushed then kissed Anna on the forehead  
"Okay kids you've finished your food. Go brush your teeth and get your PJs on.”

Dean watched as the kids got up to go do as their brother asked. He got up himself as well and started collecting the dirty plates from the table to bring into the kitchen.

CAS gathered what he could in one hand and then carried it to dean   
"Here, this is the last of the plates” he placed them beside the sink

Dean smiled at the other and put the plates in the sink. "Thank you," he said cheerfully, starting to rinse them.

"I'm going to make sure Anna is getting ready for bed and not just playing." With that he walked out the kitchen.


End file.
